My only thought
by jemster23
Summary: Life as a superstar isn't all its cracked up to be. But all that is about to change.When Edward meets Bella he is immediately smitten. Its getting her to understand that which proves the problem. Is that too big of an ask, even for him?
1. Chapter 1

**Title:My only thought.**

**Summary: Life as a superstar isn't all its cracked up to be. But all that is about to change for Hollywood's latest golden boy, when what should be a routine interview turns into something more. When Edward meets Bella he is immediately smitten, but its getting her to understand that which proves the problem. Is that too big of an ask, even for him?**

**Disclaimer:Obviously I own nothing twilight related :(**

**A/N: OK so here goes. This is a version of my other story (dreaming of you) from Edwards perspective. So I suggest you read that story first so that it makes sense.**

**Oh and special thanks to vampiregirl141995 for helping with the title:)**

Chapter 1.

Only an hour to go and I would be home...

After the best part of the last year travelling around the globe home sounds so good right about now, even if it is only for a short holiday.

Life as an actor can be pretty challenging to say the least, but that's what I relish and ultimately what keeps me motivated and satisfied in this career path.

When I first started out things were pretty tough and as a unknown I had to fight tooth and nail for every role. Landing my first lead role turned everything around for me, though never in my wildest dreams did I imagine my career would take off in the way it did.

Sometimes I have to pinch myself to make sure its not a dream.

Though even dreams have their drawbacks.

Travelling around the world from one exotic country to the next you would be forgiven for thinking it was all fun and games. But the reality is that a lot more hard work goes on behind the scenes than what people think.

The public see the glitzy and glamorous side of the job, what they don't see is the hard graft involved in countless auditions, re shoots, promotional tours and repetitive interviews that make this career both emotionally and physically draining.

Then there's the added stresses and strains posed by the press. I try to stay out of limelight and avoid them as best as I can, but they are very creative with the truth to say the least.

Don't get me wrong I love my job I just don't like the fame and celebrity that is attached to it.

It probably sounds preposterous and ungrateful to complain when you seemingly have everything, but sometimes, just sometimes, usually when I've had a particularly trying time with the paparazzi I wish I could do without the fame side of it all and just be taken seriously as a actor rather than the latest pretty boy in Hollywood.

In many respects I envy my best friend Jasper and the relatively normal life he leads.

He has a steady job in the city, a stable home life, and is ridiculously happy and loved up with his girlfriend Alice.

Over the years Alice has become like a sister to me and despite her bubbly, slightly zany personality its impossible not to like her. With the exception that is of when she interferes in my personal life!

I only have myself to blame, when one night after far too many drinks I stupidly let slip my desires to have a normal relationship.

Of course Alice being the joyful pixie she is was more than keen to help out. Even smugly declaring that she already had someone perfect in mind. Yet despite her positive attitude nothing ever came of it.

It was probably just as well considering how pathetic my love life really is.

Believe it or not I have never been good in relationships. In high school girls didn't want to know me, and when they finally started noticing me I was too focussed on first medical school and then establishing my career to find the time to date.

Despite all the rumours and speculation in the press that I had dated half of Hollywood I am nowhere near as prolific as they make out.

If you believed everything you read it is a miracle I find the time to make any movies with all the romancing I am supposedly busy doing.

Contrary to popular belief I have only ever dated one fellow professional, and what a mistake that was! I should have known better than to date a fellow actress, and needless to say I learnt my lesson after the first date was memorable for entirely the wrong reasons.

In truth it was probably the worst 2 hours of my entire life.

It was a true test to my acting skills sitting through dinner with one of the moodiest, most high maintenance and obsessive women in history. All she did was talk about herself, and when she eventually diverted the conversation away from her latest project it was to estimate how many calories there were in the salad she was eating.

Since that particular disaster I have steered clear of dating, though sadly my failure is not just limited to fellow celebrities.

As a typical struggling actor I had tried dating a few 'normal' girls but sadly that hadn't worked out either. Whilst they were nice enough there wasn't that spark or connection, and ultimately it fissled out before ever really getting started.

You would laugh if you knew what a hindrance my celebrity status was. The truth is that this job doesn't lend itself well to relationships, whether we want them to or not.

Its not just finding the time that is tricky, its the trust and responsibility that goes with bringing someone into a life that is under constant scrutiny.

How do you willingly bring someone into something that there mind could noway comprehend until they actually experience it first hand?

"Wakey wakey Eddie boy!" Emmett's booming voice interrupted my contemplation.

I scowled up at him. He knew I hated it when he called me that. It was almost as bad as the times he thought he was being funny by calling me Eduardo.

"We will be landing soon. Get a move on, we gotta have you bright and perky for the shoot," he instructed as I rubbed my tired eyes, willing myself to wake up.

One thing I will say is that being famous certainly has some perks and once we landed we breezed through the usual airport procedures relatively quickly, without attracting too much attention from the gathering crowd and photographers.

Before I knew it we were on our way into central London, another thing I have Alice to thank for. Despite supposedly being on holiday I was doing an exclusive interview as a favour to her.

Did I mention she was a pushy little thing and once set her mind on something there really is no dis-wading her. She never stops digging until she gets what she wants!

It sounds ludicrous but she has this look that makes any target crumble. Even before I met her Jasper warned me about such look. At the time I laughed it off, telling him no sympathetic look or puppy dog pout could trick me.

Guess who turned out to be the fool when she turned that look right around on me.

Its a shame she wouldn't be around today purely for the comedy value. Alice would undoubtedly make a boring shoot bearably.

After a short drive we pulled up outside the head office. The second I stepped foot inside the building the staring started. Baring in mind my less than impressive track record the attention was something I would never get used to.

Lets just say I wasn't exactly Mr popular back in school. Thankfully things changed when hit my late teens and I grew out of my 'awkward' stage as my mom affectionately calls it. She was being more than generous with that description.

How the tables have turned.....

Eager to avoid causing a scene I headed straight for reception before we were guided upstairs to do the shots for the feature ahead of our meeting with the editor.

The photo shoot was fine, I was used to them by now. So much so that I could practically revert to autopilot in order to get the shots that were needed. The meeting however was another story altogether.

I tried to appear attentive and interested as Kate, the editor went over the details for tomorrows interview, but my attention started lagging as lunchtime approached.

I nodded or smiled at all the necessary breaks and pauses but I was struggling to focus with my ravenous stomach growling throughout after avoiding the putrid excuse for food that they passed off on the aeroplane.

"Anything we can do for you Mr Cullen we would be happy to help," a eager voiced obviously picked up on my preoccupied state.

"Some food would be good," I said with a shy smile.

"Not a problem we can get your something right away," she eagerly offered, before signally for her assistant to join us.

"Honestly its fine I can go," I offered desperate for a time out.

I looked across to Emmett who smiled knowingly. He knew when I needed alone time away from all the jargon and business talk.

"I will leave it with Emmett to finalise any details regarding tomorrow," I offered.

Emmett shot me a bemused look before looking back across to Kate. My gaze followed his only to find she was looking at me oddly.

"Miss? " I prompted confused by her strange behaviour.

"Oh oh okay then," she stuttered, blushing furiously before seemingly composing herself. "You'll find the cafeteria is on the first floor," she helpfully offered.

"It was a pleasure meeting you Mr Cullen,"she finally said after a pause and once again that strange look appeared.

I nodded shyly offering her a smile before making my way out the door.

The staring continued the whole way into the cafeteria and whilst I didn't want to appear rude or obnoxious it was more than little uncomfortable, so I kept my head down.

After grabbing some food I found a seat near the back hoping not to draw too much attention to myself but my attempts was futile.

I didn't look up, though I didn't need to to know that everyone was gaping at me. Call it a sixth sense or practice, but I was used to it by now, especially in predominantly female workplaces.

When the stares and giggling became more obvious I cursed myself under my breathe. Perhaps it wasn't such a bright idea coming here in first place.

It was the same everywhere I went, there was this unhealthy obsession with my looks and fame.

No matter how much I try to block it out some things are impossible to ignore. I sighed in disappointment before one particular conversation caught my attention.

"Who's he?" A soft voice asked.

"You don't know who that is? What planet are you from Bella?" another more harsh voice snapped in response. I instantly felt sorry for this Bella girl whoever she was.

Despite my unease at being the topic of conversation I couldn't draw my attentions away from their discussion. I know its rude to eavesdrop but in my defence she wasn't exactly discreet.

I doubt she realised how loud she was as she rattled on. Her poor friend couldn't even get a word in edgeways.

I kept my head down and bit the inside of my cheek, a nervous tic I had picked up over the years when I heard motor mouth recounting my supposed love life. She was thorough I will give her that, and even mentioned Tanya fucking Denali!

According to the tabloids she was my current love interest. Despite being completely wide of the mark my refusal to talk about it only fuelled speculation that we were dating. In the end I gave up and stopped reading all the sordid details.

I was slowly loosing interest when that softer voice finally interrupted. Though when I registered what she said it threw me completely. "Maybe he's gay?"

Okay so that was a first!

I stifled a laugh but was too amused to keep my head down any longer. I looked up and immediately my eyes fell upon the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.

I have been around my fair share of actresses and models who were beyond photogenic but they held nothing to this girl, correction this woman. I couldn't explain it but there was something about her that completely captivated me the second I laid eyes on her.

Very rarely did a woman leave me speechless but she achieved it in 5 second flat.

She was stunning but in a completely natural way. Her hair was long and rich brown, a stark contrast to her pale porcelain like skin and she had a lovely heart shaped face that made her appear youngish, perhaps in her early 20's.

But it was her eyes that were most breathtaking, I was mesmerised as the warmest brown eyes gently probed mine. We seemed to hold each others gazes and an adorable blush lit up her entire face.

"Trust me Edward Cullen is not gay," motor mouth sniggered besides her.

I raised an amused eyebrow but immediately regretted it when she flushed even deeper and looked down at the table. I cursed my male pride for making her feel embarrassed and uncomfortable.

Not wanting to appear too obvious or sleazy I begrudgingly looked away and fought the urge to look at her. I failed miserably and not 10 seconds later my gaze returned to her. I wasn't even discreet and blatantly stared across willing here to look up.

She didn't but that only increased my interest in her. If anything I found her behaviour strangely amusing. She was deliberately avoiding looking at me, it was a shame the same couldn't be said for her neighbour who was fixated on me. But even that didn't halt my observations.

I'm pretty sure she noticed too judging by her awkward shuffling and fidgeting. She was a very intriguing character and I found myself fascinated by her quirky mannerisms. Like the way she deliberately used her hair as a shield or the way she subconsciously bit her full bottom lip that I was trying not to focus on for too long.

Evidently she was either very nervous or very clumsy. In the space of 5 minutes she managed to spill her coke, that coming after she had practically chocked on it when our eyes locked once more.

Regardless I found her calamity strangely endearing and I had the unexplainable urge to protect her most likely from herself.

Eventually when her cheeks cooled from the last mishap I was beyond rejuvenated when her gaze met mine, but again she looked away all too soon for my liking.

I couldn't explain the disappointment I felt when I noticed she was leaving and begrudgingly watched on as she headed towards the door, but not without one final stumble.

She really was a danger to herself.

I smiled fondly when she chanced a sly glance across. I was half way to getting up and picking up her papers that had gone flying when another guy beat me to it.

At that moment the green eyed monster in me surfaced at his obvious interest. Fair play to the guy I understood his attraction to her. But whilst I admired his courage for even attempting a shot at someone who was so obviously way out of his league it was more than a little uncomfortable watching him so openly drooling over her.

I ran a hand through my hair and groaned in frustration. I was being ridiculous, immature and completely territorial.

Worse still I was jealous.

I didn't even know her but I knew I wanted to. Thankfully she seemed more embarrassed than interested in his attention. Her cheeks immediately reddened as she muttered a polite but uncomfortable thanks.

I couldn't contain my wide smile at her less than enthusiastic response and had to bite the inside of my cheek to prevent my smile from turning into a smirk. It was inevitable as seconds later my delighted smile grew ridiculously wide when she offered me a shy glance on her way out!

Maybe these places weren't so bad after all......

I stayed in the cafeteria until the majority of people had left before heading off in search of Emmett. But not before sending the blond kid a unimpressed stare on my way out. I was never usually this aggressive but there was something about him that infuriated me. Well not him exactly more his intentions towards a certain person.

The journey home was pleasant and despite Emmett's banter I couldn't stop thinking over my time in the cafeteria.

Even when I went to greet my mother and father I couldn't stop thinking about her the rest of the day.

Throughout dinner I struggled to keep the ridiculous smile off my face, a fact that didn't go unnoticed by my observant mother who picked up on my distraction straight away. She eyed me curiously all night but waited until we finished dinner before beginning her questioning.

"How has your day been? Anything interesting to tell me?" she asked expectantly.

"Nothing new just the usual." I kept my voice level, attempting to downplay it.

Unfortunately she knew me all too well and only looked more suspicious.

"Your hiding something!" she suddenly accused. I never could get anything past her.

"Mom its nothing," I tried to sound firm and determined but she saw right through me.

She only eyed me curiously before a delighted smile lit up her face. "You've met someone!" She exclaimed, unable to keep the joy from her voice.

"Mom,"I groaned cringing on the inside.

I didn't say anything more, there was no point I was blushing and grinning like a total idiot, just from picturing her face.

Whilst my mom sighed obviously content that she had her answer, I couldn't even bring myself to look at my father who sat sniggering in the corner. Thanks for that dad!

When I finally drifted off to sleep it was with the image of the beautiful girl in mind, a vision I was desperately hoping to catch another glimpse of tomorrow.

**A/N: This is my first attempt at writing Edwards pov so please be kind! Its j****ust a short chapter to test the waters. I really hope you like it :|**

******Review if you do :)**

******Me x**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**A/N:I'm completely blown away by the feedback and response to the first chapter. Thank you so much! **

**In a way that makes me more reluctant about this next chapter! ****I hope you like it just as much.....**

**It is only a short one because I had to split it into two chapters otherwise it would have been ridiculously long. **

**Finally thanks a million to Jo for all of your help with this chapter. Your suggestions were ingenious:) **

Chapter 2

"Let yourself in why don't you," I called out hearing the front door slam, shortly followed by heavy footsteps stomping their way through the hallway.

"Quit the sarcasm, we haven't got time for it," Emmett snipped as he rounded the corner into the kitchen.

"Why aren't you ready yet?" he accused.

He didn't give me the chance to reply before he was off on one again.

"Hurry up otherwise we're going to be late. Have you forgotten what central London is like at this time in the morning?"

"What are you talking about? Its only 830. I think I have time for some breakfast before one quick appointment,"I justified, grabbing a bowl and a box of cereal in the other hand.

"I waste my time," Emmett grumbled, fisting his hands in his short hair, a habit he claimed I had inflicted on him.

"Were you even listening to a word I said on the way home yesterday?" he questioned, only to become even more aggravated by the blank look I sent his way.

"Like I told you before we have to fit in some extra interviews so we had to re-schedule to a more appropriate venue!" he explained, completely unaware that he had shattered my perfect illusion of how the day would pan out.

"What!You've got to be kidding me" I exclaimed.

Emmett meanwhile sent me a bemused look.

"We've been through this already. Seriously man what is going on with you? You've been acting strange since yesterday afternoon," he accused, narrowing his eyes at me.

"Jet lag I guess," I claimed and fought to keep the disappointment from showing on my face.

"Its never bothered you before," he snipped, helping himself to a bowl and attempted to grab the box of cereal out of my hands.

"Do you mind," I scowled, sending him a icy stare.

"No," he quipped amused.

"Looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of bed this morning," he snipped, snatching the box completely and sending a few scraps flying in the process.

"Now look what you've done!" I seethed, before cleaning up his mess.

"Grouchy this morning aren't you Cullen,"he sounded amused, his grin turning evil.

"Clearly someone's not getting any." The bastard winked at my discomfort, knowing full well I wasn't 'getting any' as he so eloquently put it.

"Shut it," I scowled, pushing past him to reclaim my seat before he took that as well.

On any other occasion I wouldn't have minded his teasing, but in mind of earlier developments I couldn't explain both the annoyance and disappointment I felt at the prospect of not seeing her again.

"You know I'm only messing with you man," Emmett affirmed, taking the seat besides me.

"I respect that shit your sticking to. Fair play to you I sure as hell couldn't do it," he said shaking his head.

A comfortable silence fell between the two of us whilst we demolished our breakfast. Emmett being the bigmouth that he was, unsurprisingly finished first and went off to demolish the last of the juice from the fridge.

"You know we could always do that favour for Alice first. Its on the way,"I offered, attempting to sound normal. I don't think I pulled it off.

Emmett on the other hand seemed rather intrigued."Why would we do that?" he asked sending a peculiar look my way.

"Like I said its on the way, plus it would break up the same mundane questioning," I reasoned, trying to sound logical, but even to my own ears it sounded pretty lame.

"Don't worry about it. Everything sorted now anyway. I'll drop you off on the way," he said, effectively ending the discussion.

"You just focus on getting yourself ready," he ordered, practically shoving me out of the kitchen.

So much for a good day I thought mournfully.

But it could be worse, at least I knew where she worked and even better maybe Alice knew her and could help me out.

After I had freshened up and changed I was ready to head out. As expected the journey across town was difficult to say the least. In light of Emmett earlier questioning I tried not to let my disappointment show.

It didn't help matters that as chance would have it we passed by the same building that had been the cause of much of my dismay. I allowed myself a sly glance on the off chance that she could have been there. Yeah I was pathetic I know.

Predictably there was no sign of her, and although it was ludicrous I still felt disappointed.

What I wouldn't have given for just one look, one moment.

It was obviously not meant to be, but that realisation didn't make it any easier to deal with.

The traffic was pretty much bumper to bumper, and only got worse the nearer we headed into town. I had forgotten why I hated driving so much.

Seriously the amount of nut cases they handed licenses out to astounded me.

At the pace we were going I was half tempted to get out and catch the tube instead, but at least Emmett was good company. He was laughing and joking the entire journey,and repeatedly swearing at other drivers.

Another factor that brightened up my foul mood was the few random texts I received from Alice. I was smiling the moment her name popped up.

_Hey Eddie thanks again for doing this for me._

_Your the best!_

_Shame I cant be there:(_

_Ali x_

I smiled to myself, Alice was the only one who got away with calling me Eddie.

**No worries Ali,**

**But you owe me. I may need a favour in return?????**

**E**

_That sounds intriguing!_

_Oh I forgot to warn you, the girl interviewing you is a real BITCH!_

_Good Luck with that!!!!!_

_Ali x_

**Thanks for the heads up.**

**Shame you couldn't have warned me before hand!**

**E**

_I'm telling you know aren't I?_

_Ali x_

**Geeze thanks.**

**Anyway I gotta go now we're almost here.**

**Wish me luck......**

**E**

_Good luck big bro_

_Remember to beware of Lauren's advances ;)_

_She is a sly one!_

_Ali x_

I smiled at her term of endearment before fitting in one last message.

**I think I can mange little sis.**

**Hope to see you next time I'm in town.**

**Bye**

**E x**

After crawling through traffic Emmett dropped me off before rushing away to negotiate several public appearances I would be making the next time I was back in town.

"Only one more to go," Leah my publicist announced after a slow morning filled with a couple of standard and repetitive interviews.

Great saving the best for last I thought wearily.

This Lauren girl had to be some piece of work for Alice not to like her. Honestly that pixie was best friends with everybody.

"Last up we have," Leah paused looking down at her list. "Isabella swan," she eventually finished, signalling for one of the reps to go fetch her.

Isabella? What happened to Lauren?

Suddenly the words from yesterday came back to haunt me. _What planet are you from Bella_

Isabella sounded a lot like Bella? It couldn't possibly be... could it?

My heart did a involuntary flip at the possibility before I regained a grip on reality. I cursed myself for linking everything back to her. I was bad enough already without over indulging in my fantasy anymore.

Leah was in the process of going over next months schedule when the doors abruptly swung open. Instinctively I put on my usual welcoming smile, but my heart stopped dead in my chest when in walked the person that had plagued my mind for the past 24 hours.

Our eyes locked instantly and I couldn't contain the blatant smile from breaking out across my face. She was just as beautiful, if not more so than I remembered.

She approached hesitantly but when she finally reached me I was too amazed that she was right here in front of me to form a sentence. Since when had I been so nervous?

"Hello," I said when I finally found my voice.

"Hi," she timidly replied back.

"I'm Edward Cullen and you must be Isabella?" I asked, extending my hand towards her.

"Y- yeah I prefer Bella. Nice to meet you," she stuttered, delicately placing her hand in mine.

It sounds contrived but I felt a instant spark the second our hands touched. Judging by the speed at which she dropped my hand and the adorable blush that soon followed I knew she felt it too.

It was nice to see that I seemed to be having the same affect on her that she had on me.

Remembering the manners my mother had enforced on me from a young age I pulled the chair out besides her and motioned for her to take a seat. Bella however stared at it intently with the most adorably confused expression on her face before she eventually sat down.

"I remember you from yesterday. I noticed you talking with your boyfriend after your trip." I commented having taken the seat directly opposite her so I could gauge her reaction.

I knew full well that the kid wasn't a threat but ultimately his acknowledgement served the greater purpose of finding out whether she was single or not.

Who was I kidding someone so perfect had to be taken.

Her eyes immediately grew wide, and brows furrowed.

"Boyfriend?" she asked, sending me a bemused look.

"The blond kid, slightly shabby looking?" Sleazy, pervy, try hard, complete moron, I silently added.

She laughed lightly, a cute little snort working its way out.

"Oh no, Mike is definitely not my boyfriend!" she quickly replied.

I was temporarily elated but nonetheless dissatisfied. Here goes nothing.  
"But you have one right?" I asked, only to be rewarded with my favourite blush.

Did she blush at everything? I certainly hoped so, I wanted to see a lot more of that delightful colour to her cheeks.  
"No," she shyly responded. I left out a breathe I didn't realise I was holding and desperately foughtto keep the delirious smile off my face.

Obviously not one to be the centre of attention, Bella was quick to divert the conversation back to the task at hand.

Surprisingly though she seemed apprehensive, and slightly unsure of herself when she outlined the way she wished to proceed with the interview.

"Ask away" I encouraged, hoping to reassure her.

Soon after her initial awkwardness disappeared and we both immediately became more confident and comfortable around one another.

In a world of so many fake, overconfident, entertainment types who were only obsessed with fame, looks, and celebrity, it was refreshing to find someone so normal and down to earth.

Whilst I always tried to be polite and courteous in interviews I always kept my guard up, never wanting to slip up and give to much away.

But with Bella it was different, she seemed almost vulnerable and naive to this business. Maybe it was because she was so genuine and reserved, but there was something about her that put me at ease and made me feel comfortable discussing anything with her.

Very rarely did I talk so freely and openly in an interview but she seemed so genuinely interested in what I had to say that I couldn't stop myself from opening up to her about my life, my family, my career. Quite honestly I would have answered any question she asked me.

It didn't help matters that she was so distracting beautiful up close and I was frequently fighting the urge to stare into those soulful eyes.

But as much as I was enjoying the playful banter that we were exchanging, I was less than impressed by the attention our friendliness was gathering.

I couldn't miss the blatant and intense glares my publicist was sending our way. I was fairly certain Bella hadn't noticed, otherwise I'm sure her cheeks would have warmed as they had on countless occasions during our initial chatter.

For a while I tried to ignore the scrutiny we were under but eventually my patience turned to frustration. All I wanted was some time for just the two of us.

I spent the next few minutes debating my next move before finally summoning up the courage to do something about it.

Taking a deep breathe I nervously looked across to Bella.

"I don't suppose you want to get out of here. I know a great café down the road from here. We can stay here if you like, but I'm starting to feel like a goldfish in a bowl," I finished, gesturing towards our unwanted audience.

Bella's cheeks turned scarlet when she registered the funny looks we were on the receiving end of.

She remained silent for what felt like an eternity before finally putting me out of my misery.

"Y-heh sure," she finally said.

That was all I needed to hear.

After informing one of the reps that we were done for the day, I was immediately by Bella's side to help her into her coat. Emmett took great pleasure in taking the piss out of me when I did such things but it was the way I had been brought up.

"Ladies first," I offered, holding the door open for her on our way out.

Most people looked at me oddly when I did that or other nothing gestures, but it was second nature to me. Bella was no exception, and she too seemed slightly taken aback.

"Good manner cost nothing. My mother taught me to always treat women properly," I replied to her obvious confusion.

"She taught you well," she responded so quietly that I was uncertain whether she meant for me to hear it or not.

Leading her out of the stuffy hotel I headed towards a more homely and comforting surroundings that I hoped would give us more privacy and a chance to get to know her better..............

**Please review:)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N :So this is the last chapter for a while-hope you like!**

**Thanks to everyone who has supported this story, I cant tell you how much I appreciate it:)**

Chapter 3

Making our way down the fairly deserted streets I couldn't stop looking at Bella besides me. More worryingly, it was becoming increasingly difficult to act natural around her when all I wanted to do was to take her hand in mine. But that would have been overstepping the mark, and besides that she had shown no signs of returning my feelings. In fact she still seemed a little hesitant.

"Am I walking too fast for you?" I teased, noticing she had fallen behind.

"No," she responded, turning three shades of red.

"Come on then, I need a proper coffee," I said, somehow resisting the urge to reach out for her hand.

Seeing the familiar coffee shop in sight I smiled to myself. Whenever I wanted some place quiet to think or relax this was always where I came. I tell you the coffee here got me through many late nights of cramming for exams in my student days.

I was busy taking a trip down memory lane when Bella broke me from my reverie.

"Oh my god I know this place. I used to come here when I was a student." she suddenly declared.

"Really? I used to come here all the time in my student days too. When did you graduate?"

"2008," she answered.

Now it was my turn to be shocked. "I studied at the same time. I used to have lectures just down the road from here. So I came here practically every week," I replied, still a little taken by surprise.

"Flaxman building right?" Bella questioned.

I could only nod back in reply, amazed that our paths seemed destined to cross.

"How strange. We must have walked past each other a thousand times," she speculated.

"No we didn't. If I'd have seen you I would have stopped. I wouldn't have kept on walking." I found myself replying before I could control myself.

"Charmer," she teased, playfully nudging me. The slight contact setting off the pounding in my chest once more.

Minutes later when we had settled down at a table in the corner I could tell Bella's mind was somewhere else. I had never wished I could read minds more so than at that particular moment where she appeared immersed in her thoughts.

I had no clue as to what she was thinking so intently about and for a few moments I sat back in my chair studying her before she snapped out of her daze like state.

"Sorry this has thrown me a little," she uttered looking adorably lost.

"This." she paused, gesturing between the two of us. "Is so surreal. Don't you think that it is such a strange coincidence. Just think we could have been sat right next to each other and we'd never have known."

I smiled at the absurdity of her suggestion.

"Trust me I would have known. I would have noticed you." I replied honestly but Bella instantly brushed past my compliment.

"Okay Mr smooth."

I stared at her totally dumbfounded. Couldn't she see how amazing and unforgettable she was? Or was the issue that she didn't trust me? That thought angered me immensely. I had been nothing but honest and up front with her.

"I'm serious Bella. If Id have seen you in here I would have said hello and asked if I could join you. I wouldn't have let you walk away without giving me your number first." It came out a little sharper than I intended, but I wanted to convey the honesty behind my words.

Bella on the other hand was blushing furiously and refused to look at me. I could feel her discomfort from here.

As the silence became unbearable I fisted a hand in my hair in frustration at my ability to make her feel uncomfortable.

Shaking my head as if to clear my muddled thoughts, I looked up to find those mesmerising brown eyes piercing mine.

It was my turn to shift uncomfortably. "I'm sorry, I'm making you feel uncomfortable. I didn't mean to embarrass you" I apologised trying to salvage what was left of the conversation.

"It's fine. So to the interview," she quickly diverted us away from my heartfelt declaration and reverted straight back to interview mode. It was probably for the best anyway, just in case I put my foot in it anymore.

We pretty much picking up from where we left off and once again Bella was firing questions at me left right and centre. Amusingly it was almost like an interrogation.

The amazing part was that discussing the usual topics and repetitive question suddenly seemed fresh and exciting coming for her. I was completely at ease as we laughed and joked together.

There was only one thing that didn't add up and that was her less than enthusiastic reaction to the films that had kick-started my career. She tried to look interested but I was certain there was something I was missing.

"So have you seen any of my films?" I decided to question her on her indifference.

"Of course," she replied a little to quickly for my liking. My suspicions grew when her eyes didn't quite meet mine.

"I had to ask. You don't seem in awe of me as most of the other female reporters do," I said trying to sound casual.

"Maybe I'm not so susceptible to your charms,"she teased.

"Pity." I quietly muttered, but my disappointment was immediately forgotten when her tell tale blush reappeared.

"So tell me, which is your favourite?" I asked trying to disguise my suspicion.

Her eyes flashed with panic, before her calm exterior returned.

"If you hadn't noticed Edward I'm female." I laughed more to myself, she really was a terrible liar.

"So obviously it has to be Twilight,"she eventually finished.

When her cheeks turned a deeper shade of pink I knew I was close.

"The fact that I play a lovestruck werewolf got you huh?" I teased, hoping to catch her out.

"You mean a vampire?" she countered, looking me straight in the eye. My breathing hitched and I shook my head to clear my muddled thoughts.

"So you did see it," I laughed to cover my fascination with her beautiful eyes.

"Of course. That's what I said didn't I?" she said with a sly grin.

Her smile was triumphant but I saw straight through it. She was hiding something and I intended to prove it.

"That you did. So tell me this," I paused debating my next move.

Leaning in towards her, I sent her the infamous stare that my mother scalded me for using on her when I was younger and wanted to get my own way.

Staring at her intently, she looked back at me with a slightly dazed expression. Here comes the test...

"Is Seth your dream guy too?" I softly asked.

There was silence for what felt like an eternity before she eventually spoke."Y- Yeah s-sure. Who doesn't like a guy who will live forever," she breathed.

"Gottcha!!" I shouted victoriously. "I knew it. I knew you were lying!"

"Am not."she resorted but her voice lacked its earlier conviction.

I raised a amused eyebrow at her defiance even now.

"Oh really, then tell me how did you mistake the lead characters name with that of another film I was in?" I playfully mocked.

Her cheeks were all out bright red by this point.

"Movies aren't really my thing,"she said with a shrug.

Her explanation only fuelled my laughter before she sent a unamused scowl my way.

"Excuse me, but that sounds slightly odd coming from a reporter who specialises in the entertainment industry." I challenged.

What was I missing?

"I'm not usually. I'm just filling in for one of the girls who is on holiday. I'm a bit out of my depth here. I'm sorry I mislead you," she sighed disheartened.

Her earlier tension returned as her shoulders slouched and her posture tensed. I hated seeing her so defeated.

"Don't worry about it," I eagerly tried to reassure her."And for the record, I think your doing great."

Her eyes held mine as I reached across to lightly touch her hand.

In the end I had to pull back and look away as I tried to ignore the feelings Bella was bringing out in me.

"Your a terrible liar by the way. It was your cheeks that gave you away you know," I teased and immediately we were back on track.

Whilst Bella was undoubtedly thorough in her questioning there was one topic notably absent from her interrogation. I could see her anxiety building as she danced around the one question that was guaranteed to pop up in any interview.

Bella probably didn't see it herself but her apprehension was plain to see. Everything from her fidgetting around in her seat, to the worry in her eyes, right down to the way she was anxiously nibbling on her bottom lip showed her unease.

I was half tempting to broach the subject of my love life myself for fear that she was going to draw blood by the way she was going. Though thankfully she worked through her uncertainty before I had to intervene.

"So to the questions my readers will be most interested in. Your love life!" she finally stated.

Usually I would have responded with a simple no comment or mandatory speech about keep my private life private but like so many other occasions in the past hour I found myself opening up to Bella.

"It will probably be a surprise but I'm not as prolific as many assume. If I'm honest, I will admit that I have been put off relationships. I have come across my fair share of fake girls in this business who are only interested in the superficial side of my job."

"I might be an actor but I have standards too. I'm not just after a quick shag,"I said in response to her obvious surprise.

"But the rumours?"she gently asked

I let out a frustrated sign, not at Bella, more at the rumours that I was constantly embroiled in.

"My dating life is like a circus. One minute I'm dating a Russian princess, the next an American actress. Even I struggle to keep up. It sound like a fun life. But trust me its not so exciting when it is you they are making up lies about." I admitted.

"So what's the story now?"She was a pushy little thing I will give her that.

"There is no story. I'm single. I sometimes struggle to cope, let alone willingly lead someone else into the chaos that is my life. Its not fair to put someone I care about through that. I'm not sure they would cope with the constant attention and pressure."

I sighed wearily as the weight of my words sunk in.

No matter how strongly I felt about Bella my own admittance only reinforced the thoughts I was so desperately trying to push aside.

The fact was that Bella didn't belong in my world of brassy, pushy photographers who were only interested in the big money shot. And they certainly didn't care who they had to step on to get it.

The moment I first laid eyes on Bella I wanted to protect her from her own clumsyness, but what I really needed to do was protect her from me and the farce that came with my celebrity status.

As I sighed disheartened Bella soft voice broke me from my moping.

"I find that hard to believe. There is a long list of willing women out there who are more than keen to date you."

She tried to sound positive but her enthusiasm only made me all the more despondent.

It didn't matter how many potential love interests there were. I only desired one person, one who was blissfully unaware of that fact.

"Not the right kind of girl, not the type I'm looking for. I might be an actor Bella, but I still have feeling. Its hard judging whether a girl wants me for the fame, success or money. I'd much rather be alone than have to second guess every single action. Besides I don't have the time for a girlfriend right now anyway." I tried to cover my disappointment.

"Unless of course you still think I'm gay?" I teased, hoping to lighten the mood.

"You heard that?" she asked sceptically.

"Your not as invisible as you seem to think. But trust me on this. I am definitely not gay." I somehow managed to hold in my laughter.

"So what is your type?" Bella shyly asked.

I looked across suspiciously but she stubbornly held my gaze.

"For my readers- give them at least a bit of hope." She encouraged but her blush gave her away.  
"For your readers of course" I winked at her playfully before answering.

"I don't have a type as such. Just the idea of someone smart and kind and honest." You I silently added.

"Honesty is a big thing for me. Its far more important than looks or any of the other superficial shit. I want to find a normal girl who isn't attracted to the glamorous side of my job."

"You wont have a shortage of offers," Bella interrupted.

My eyes instantly met hers and a sudden thought hit me. "Okay I have spilled my dating disasters so now its your turn."

"No way." She immediately refused.

"I told you mine, so as law dictates you have to tell me yours." I tried to sound strong and determined but she wasn't budging.  
"That's not fair. I didn't agree to anything!" she wined, looking adorable when she pouted.

There was no way I was going to let this drop now. If anything her reluctance only made me more determined.

"It doesn't matter. Rules are rules, so tell me." I pressed.

"No!" she showed no sign of backing down.

I sat pondering my options for a moment before a strike of genius hit me.

"Tell you what, I have a suggestion. I know you have to ask about Tanya but if you answer my questions then maybe I will answer yours. Usually I refuse to be drawn on that, but I am willing to make an exception for you," I grinned hoping I had enticed her into it.  
"That's not how it works!"She protested.  
"Fine have it your way. It makes no difference to me. You're the one turning down an exclusive!" I said trying to act indifferent, I don't think I pulled it off.  
"Fine," she finally weakened and there was no holding back my victorious smile.

"So tell me all about the love life of Bella Swan," I encouraged.  
"I'm the one meant to be asking the questions." She huffed in annoyance.  
"No your the one avoiding mine." I was on to her stalling.

"There's not a lot to say really. I was seeing a guy called Jacob for a while. We met at uni and started dating soon after. Things looked to be getting serious or so I thought, until I found him in bed with another girl."

She tried to pass it off as nothing but from the distant look in her eyes I knew it was a lot more raw to her than she was letting on.

So many emotions flickered thought my mind at the thought of someone betraying her so callously. Usually I was a pretty calm and collected, but the anger I felt towards that guy surprised even me. Its a good job I didn't know where he lived otherwise I would have been straight over there. Bella deserved someone who would love and cherished her and treated her right, not someone who betrayed her trust and took her for granted.

If we were together I would never put her through that, not ever. Regardless of where I was or what I was doing I knew with absolute certainty that Bella would never doubt that she always came first.

In that one moment I knew what I needed to do. I would become her friend and earn her trust and respect that way before moving towards anything romantic. I couldn't rush into this, she was too special.

"Did you love him?" I suddenly asked. I didn't want to cause her further pain by dragging this discussion out unnecessary, but I needed to know.

"No,"she showed no hesitation. "I liked him a lot but it wasn't love. He was kind, funny and smart and I was attracted to that."

"He cant have been that smart. He let you go," I interrupted and that beautiful blush reappeared.

"It's fine, I'm fine, I got over it. At least I found out before things got serious. Besides I don't need a man anyway. I'm comfortable and perfectly fine in my own space." She was trying to downplay it but I could see the sorrow in her eyes.

"So since then?" I hinted. Now that she wasn't being so reclusive I wanted to hear more.

"I might be over him but the betrayal stays with you. Since then I've found it hard to let anyone else in. Lets just say that I'm not so good at dating. I kind of have the habit of self destructing every relationship that I get into so that I don't get hurt." She confessed.

I felt a tug at my heart at the thought of what that jerk had put her through. Once again I fought the urge to seek the loser out. That was until Bella interrupted my murderous thoughts.

"Sorry I got carried away back then," she sheepishly admitted.

"Don't be sorry. I like hearing about you," I assured her and reached for her hands across the table.

"You know Bella not all guys are like that. Jacob was a fool to let such a beautiful girl go," I said looking her straight in the eye.

"Do you always do that?" I asked, spotting her infamous blush reappear.

"Do what?"she asked utterly clueless.

"Blush whenever anyone gives you a compliment," I affirmed only for Bella to come back on the offensive. She really didn't like to be the centre of attention.

"So the rumours about you and Tanya Denali?" she countered.

I looked her dead in the eye, making sure she wouldn't doubt the sincerity of my words.

"They are exactly that Bella. They are just rumours. Yes I've met her a few times at premiers and award shows, but I've never exchange more than a few passing words with her. I don't know how these rumours even start. I only have to be in the same room as someone to be in some sort of relationship with them. The press could probably turn our conversation into a full on sex scandal, " I said with a laugh.

"That answer your question?"I laughed as her blush somehow deepened.

"By the way I do like that colour on you." I teased to see how red she could go.

"Shut up!"Bella exclaimed.

"Hey! You cant talk to me like that!" I said smiling at her stubbornness.

"I can and I will. Now I just have to end with a quick fire round and then we are all done," she said with a slight pout. I too felt slightly disappointed that our time together was coming to an end.

"Just say the first thing that comes into your head," Bella broke me from my wallowing.

"I think I can manage that," I playfully teased and without warning she was into her next round of questioning.

"Favourite place the world?"

That was an easy one, "London."

"Favourite food?"

"My mom's home made Shepherds pie. You will have to try it some time." It just kind of came out but thankfully Bella just breezed on to the next question.

"First kiss?"she asked, though I was intrigued to find her gaze intently focussed on me.

"I was 15, she was a girl who lived down my street." I kept it simple, I didn't need to tell her I was a geek and very awkward in those days.

"Surprised huh?" I challenged her shocked expression.

"My questions remember," she declared, temporarily directing my attention towards the sheet of paper in her hands.

"First car?"

"Volvo."

"Favourite colour?"

"Brown." I answered looking directly at the reason behind that choice.

"Brown! Who likes brown?" She uttered disgusted.  
"Well what's your favourite colour then miss colour police?" I diverted over to her.  
"Green," she said blushing lightly.

"Why green?" I asked intrigued by her embarrassment.

"I like grass". Bella was definitely unique.  
"Favourite music?"

"Classical."

"Really." she sounded unconvinced.

"Yes. We are not all hip hop or indie lovers!"I mocked.

My teasing was long forgotten when a forlorn expression appeared on her face when she gazed down at the sheet of paper in front of her.

Finally after a momentarily silence her eyes met mine.

"So I think I have all I need." She sounded as dejected as I felt.

My stomach plummeted at the thought of saying goodbye to her but my reluctance was immediately forgotten when Bella looked back at me with a look of pure horror on her beautiful face.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't realise that was the time. I must be keeping you from your other interviews,"

she hurriedly apologised.

I breathed a sigh of relief, glad there was nothing seriously wrong.

"Do not worry about it Bella. I enjoyed talking with you. The others they can wait."

It didn't matter that she was the last slot of the day, I could have quite happily stayed talking with her all day.

Her gaze held mine before she abruptly turned away and started riffling through her bag.

She pulled out her purse moments later.

Oh no you don't!

Just as she was about to put the money down on the table my hand caught her wrist.

"Absolutely not sweetheart, this one is on me. My treat," I said sternly.

"You're on my companies time now mister, I insist." Her resistance was futile, I was not taking no for an answer.

"We clocked off 'you're companies time' an hour ago. Now we are on my time miss Swan."

Sensing her resistance was fading I pushed on. "Humour me? " I pleaded, narrowing my eyes at her.

Needless to say I won that particular battle.

"Can I get my driver to drop you back at work?" I asked once we made it outside.

"No its fine I can catch the bus, its just as quick," she quietly replied.

"If your sure," I offered again.

Bella nodded back, suddenly she was quiet, we both were. We stared at each other, both seemingly lost for words before she broke the silence.

"Well thank you for your time Edward. It was nice to meet you," she declared and extended her hand towards me. I looked back at her in amusement.

"It was my pleasure Bella,"I replied, and ignored her hand completely to pull her into my arms in a gentle hug. If I'm honest I never wanted to let her go. My lips seemed to have a life of their own and they edged towards Bella's cheek.

It was excruciating to say goodbye to her but eventually we pulled apart. I was powerless to stop my gaze from once again drifting down towards those lips. It proved my downfall. I was so close to leaning in and kissing her, before my gentleman side took charge and I came to my senses.

I wouldn't be wooing her if I went in for a kiss straight away. That would come in time I hoped, I prayed.

I settled for whispering in her ear instead. "I cant wait to read your article," I announced.

Was it my imagination or did she look disappointed?

Reluctantly I let her go before I lost control completely and gave her the kiss that if I'm honest I had desperately wanted to give her from the moment I first spotted her.

Torturing myself a little more I watched on agonisingly when she headed towards the bus stop without a second glance my way. I prayed she would turn around just so I could see her one final time but her gaze remained focussed ahead.

I had just given up hope before she turned slightly offering me a small smile and wave. It was a simple gesture but it meant an awful lot.

Even when she got on the bus and drove out of my life, I stood there for a few moments berating my cowardliness. Damn it I should have kissed her I cursed aloud, whilst running a hand through my dishelved hair in frustration.

I groaned again when I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket. It had been going off all afternoon but thankfully I had kept it on silent so I was able to focus my attention on Bella.

Reaching for my phone I was not surprised to find no less than 6 messages awaiting for me.

Message 1 from Emmett.

******where are you?**

Message 2, again Emmett.

******Drink tonight round jaspers?**

By message 3 I was debating what I was paying him for.

******I will take your silence as a yes!!**

Message 4. Finally someone other than Emmett!

_Hey Eddie,_

_How did it go?_

_You survive the interviewer from hell with Lauren I take it?_

_Ali x_

Message 5. Surprise surprise Emmett again.

******Dude pick up your phone.**

Message 6. Seriously I needed to find some jobs to keep him occupied.

******You have till 6 and I'm gone!**

Ignoring Emmetts ramblings I went straight to Alice message.

******Hey Ali,**

******No Lauren today.**

******Bella instead? Do you know her?**

I kept it simple. After all I didn't want to look too keen.

She replied instantly.

_Ahh Bella you could say I know her. You got lucky, she great._

_Be grateful you didn't get jess- she is a real handful!_

Damn it I was hoping for more than that. Alice was a secretive pixie at times! Disappointed by Alice's lack of information I quickly replied to one of Emmett's messages instead.

******On way back now, meet you at home.**

******E**

When I finally arrived home as I suspected Emmett was already there waiting for me in the living room.

"You're late," he scowled. "I've already had Jasper on my case wondering where you were. Still on for a few beers?" he asked, scoffing his face as usual.

"Sounds good," I said trying to sound casual.

"Where were you anyway?Leah says you bailed on her," he raised an eye brow suspiciously, crossing his arms over his chest.

"You know what those places are like," I offered hoping to draw a line under his questioning. He half nodded before turning his attention back towards the giant bag of crisps he had in his hands.

Emotionally drained I took my head in my hands, trying to forget, and draw a line under today's revelations. It was no use, all I saw even when I closed my eyes was Bella's face or heard her laugh or that damn blush.

"What's up with you? You all warn out from another dumb interviewer?"Emmett interrupted.

"Don't call her that," I snapped.

"I though they're all the same? Or are we taking about the one you sneaked out of the hotel with at the end of the day?"he questioned, sending me a penetrating stare.

"It wasn't like that," I defended. "You make it sound sordid," I scowled.

"Hey I'm only telling you what Leah said. She was pretty pissed. In fact if you ask me I think she was jealous!"

"I sometimes wonder what planet your really from," I muttered under my breath.

"Hey its true!The minute you left she rang to tell how unprofessional you were being by sneaking off with some average looking girl"

"Bella is anything but average looking," I growled, enraged by such a ridiculous suggestion.

Emmett meanwhile looked amused. "Don't shoot the messenger I am only telling you what she said."

"Leah knows nothing!" I seethed. Who was she to judge anyone, Bella of all people.

"Bella's different, she's smart, and kind, not to mention funny." I smiled thinking of her many stumbles and slip ups. "And I wont have another bad word said against her," I added.

"Sounds like she got to you," Emmett muttered.

He didn't know the half of it.....

Not long after we went over to Jasper's to keep him company in Alice absence. He had it bad, though I was hardly one to talk after the past few hours moping.

I felt like one of those sappy characters Hugh grant played in movie. "Whipped" as Emmett had taunted me the entire car journey.

The scary part was that I couldn't argue against his assumption.

Ever since Bella left I hadn't been the same. I couldn't get her out of my mind no matter how hard I tried. No other girl had ever had that impact on me, it was a little terrifying if I was totally honest.

"Its been a while Cullen," Jasper patted me firmly on the back.

"That is has Whitlock,"I replied back as he let us inside.

Jasper had been my closest friend for years, along with Emmett that is. His father was a psychologist, and his dad knew mine. We practically grew up together, lived on the same street, went to the same school, had the same interests.

Jasper was the cool one, me the geek, and Emmett was the sport fantastic. But despite our obvious differences we had remained close from childhood, through to adolescence, right up until where we found ourselves now, seemingly grown ups.

Some more so than others I scoffed as Emmett barged straight through to the kitchen with a cry of "crack open the beers!"

Jasper and I shared an amused look before following after him.

I had hoped a drink or two would help take my mind off Bella, but even their company wasn't enough to keep my focus.

And of course Jasper being the sensitive soul that he was he picked up on my distraction straight away.

"What's up with you, you seems like your somewhere else?"he gently asked.

"Its nothing," I tried denying it before big mouth Emmett put his worth in.

"Ignore him he's been that way since he said goodbye to his girlfriend," he smirked, raising his can triumphantly.

Jasper meanwhile looked surprised. "Girlfriend?" he enquired arching an eyebrow towards me.

I didn't have chance to reply before Emmett beat me to it yet again.

"Eddie boy is in luvvvvv," he snipped.

"Shut up Emmett," I scowled and tried my best to shove him off the couch. Too bad he was built like a pro wrestler and easily fought of my efforts.

Always the peacemaker jasper interrupted before our play fighting escalated.

"You know Alice isn't going to be happy about this,"he mused, handing me another beer.

Seeing the confusion on my face he clarified. "She's positive her friend is your soul mate."

I sniggered at the thought of Alice and her infamous premonitions.

"So tell me about this girl that has caught your eye,"Jasper asked.

Jasper was trustworthy and without doubt the person I was most comfortable opening up to.

"She'd different jasper," I started before bigmouth interrupted.

"Is she hot?" ahh Emmett ever the romantic.

"Very, she's gorgeous but understated. She's naturally beautiful, not to mention she has the most amazing blush." I was smiling just thinking about her.

"Man I need another beer," Emmett dramatically declared.

"There's no hope for you now. Your whipped!" he muttered on his way into the kitchen.

"So you gonna tell me what the real story is?" Jasper asked when Emmett was out of earshot.

I held my head in hands contemplating for a moment or two before finally voicing my concerns.

"It's scary how deep I am. I cant explain it except to say that when I'm with her it feels different to anything I've ever felt before. She's the only one that has ever brought out these feelings in me. Its insane but it felt like we shared this intense connection," I paused momentarily before Jasper signalled me to continue.

"We've spend no more than a few hours together but it feels right. Its like I've know her forever. She's shy, clumsy, adorable...." my words drifted off at jaspers animated expression.

"What? Why are looking at me like that?"

"Nothing,she just sounds a lot like somebody I know," he said seemingly amused.

"So you've met someone, why the look of doom and gloom?" he questioned.

"She's out of my league Jasper," I sighed.

Jasper meanwhile seemed confused. "Explain," he pressed.

"She's such a good person and she's been hurt in the past. I'm afraid of hurting her too, that I'm not worthy of her either." I confessed though that was only half of the problem.

As if reading my mind Jasper picked up on my secrecy. "What are you not telling me Edward?"he probed.

"Cant get anything past you can I?" I said with a grin.

"I've known you too long to miss your worrying brow. Now spill. What is it you're not telling me?"

I took a deep breathe before voicing the thoughts that had consumed my mind all afternoon.

"Would you think I was crazy if I told you I'm in love with her?"

Jasper laughed he actually laughed before his expression turned serious.

"Edward how can you ask me that when you know mine and Alice's history," he scoffed.

I smiled remembering the day a certain little madam came up to us in the middle of a crowded bar to announce that they belonged together. She was right to, they had been together ever since.

"You see love has a habit of catching up with you when you least expect it. I'm happy for you. It's about time you weren't so alone and shut off from the world," he announced looking at me questioningly.

"So we've established that you love her, then what's stopping you?" he asked the very question I had been avoiding.

"Me, this life. Everything about me says this cant work out,"I sighed disheartened.

"Fame doesn't have to dictate who you are Edward," his voice was stern.

"I know but she's delicate jasper. I feel very possessive of her. I just worry that it would be to much for her to deal with." I hated that it was true.

"Surely its her choice to make," he countered.

"That's what I'm afraid of," I confessed.

"What do you mean?" he questioned.

"All this time I have been perfectly fine being on my own, but a few moments with Bella changed all that. She's virtually perfect, that I couldn't help but fall in love with her. Its like I've finally found someone to share this circus of a life with. Its not fair to inflict this on her but the selfish part of me doesn't care about the consequences, not if it means we are together." Geeze I was a selfish bastard!

"What am I saying we aren't even dating. I don't even know that she feels the same. Emm's right I'm whipped. But I can't help it, it feels like fate or something. There were just too many coincidences Jasper, too many little things," I declared, before shaking my head to clear my muddled thoughts.

"Listen to me I'm turning into Alice," I said laughing to myself, Jasper soon followed.

"Well as Alice would say; if its meant to be it will be. You my friend just need to be patient!" he mused.

Patient. I could manage that. I think..........


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey all,**

**I'm back, though sadly now that my travels have come to an end, now is the time I have to knuckle down and find a real job:( In the meantime, I managed to squeeze out this chapter. Hopefully you are all still interested and like:)**

It was a little after midnight when we eventually left Jaspers.

Both Emmett and I were worn out after the past few days. We rode home in relative silence, as I sat collecting my own thoughts.

I don't think Emmett could take any more of my moaning, and besides that, there was not much left to say anyway.

Like it always did, talking with Jasper helped. Finally getting things of my chest soothed my concerns that I was going crazy. I mean it was hardly rational to be head over heals after one afternoon, right?

But as Jasper had said, love wasn't that simple. It could hit at any moment. He should know, he and Alice were living proof of that.

And whilst the depth of my feelings towards a girl I hardly even knew, was slightly terrifying and completely foreign to me, I couldn't deny that letting it all out had eased some of my concerns.

When I woke up the next morning, it was with a fresh and positive attitude. I was determined not to worry, or over think -as I had the tendency to do. Instead I had to be patient. Slow and steady wins the race, so the saying goes.

Plus, it wasn't like I could start chasing Bella now anyway. I wasn't lying to her when I said I was too busy for a girlfriend right now.

I was due back in LA the following day for the premier of my latest release, and then would be back to finishing the filming of my current project. It was a pretty gruelling schedule, but once that was complete I would be back in London and free to really set my sights on Bella.

I was busy packing a few final things into my suitcase, when my phone started ringing. Seeing the called ID, I cautiously answered, keeping it a safe distance from my ear.

"Hello Alice." I smiled, waiting for that chirpy voice to puncture my eardrums. Alice was way too cheerful in the mornings. It was plain unnatural.

So she surprised the hell out of me, when all I got was a simple "hello Edward" in response.

The silence that followed, was very unlike Alice. Usually I had to fight to get a single word in with her on the other line. Something must have been off!

I was just about to question her when she beat me to me.

"I must say I am very disappointed in you Cullen. Keeping secrets from your friend. I am deeply hurt and offended," she said, feigning hurt.

"Excuse me?" I asked slightly taken aback.

"You've met someone!" She squealed, and in the process nearly deafened me.

"Damn Jasper," I muttered. I should have known he wouldn't be able to keep his mouth shut, especially when probed by Alice.

"Don't curse him. You're the one holding back on me. I'm happy for you, really I am, but why wasn't I told? And what about my friend, she'd be perfect for you!"

"Not that old story again," I interrupted, fisting a hand in my wayward hair. A few months back Alice had wanted to play matchmaker with one of her single friends. It didn't quite work out.

"That was months ago and noting ever came of it."I argued back.

"I still haven't given up," she stubbornly declared. She paused momentarily before her next onslaught of questioning began.

"So what's she like then, this mystery girl. Is she smart? I bet she's is, and pretty too. She better be good enough for you."

I smiled to myself. Bella was certainly good enough, too good if the truth be told.

"She's special Ali. She's different ….." I paused as Leah walked in, with a scowl on her face.

"Look Alice I have to go."

"Oh no you don't. Don't you dare try fobbing me off Edward!"

"No really Alice I have to. Before I do, Jasper mentioned you will be in New York at the end of the month. I'm heading there around that time. Maybe we could meet up then?" I offered, hoping to distract her somewhat.

"Yeah that would be wonderful,"she beamed. I could hear her excitement in her voice.

"I'll check my schedule and get back to you." I promised.

"You better, we have much to talk about," she cheerfully declared. I stifled a groan at the thought of her face to face interrogation.

"Goodbye Alice."

"Bye Edward, and keep me updated," she ordered, before the line went dead.

I turned around to find Leah looking at me with the same pissed off glare she had when she walked in.

"You cant afford to have any distractions, especially now that things are taking off," she said all business like.

"Alice is a friend, and I will meet her if I want to," I firmly responded.

"I wasn't talking about Alice and you know it!" She glared at me, before turning on her heels and storming off.

Returning back to LA was more difficult than I thought it would be. Despite the distraction of today's premier I was less than enthusiastic about the prospect of a night under the spotlight. If I am honest, I had felt that way since the day we left England. It was like I was missing something, or someone, but I tried not to dwell on that too much.

Despite my hopes of putting all thoughts of Bella to one side, I was pretty fucking miserable. Thankfully I was able to cover my emotions well.

In the meantime, I was busy reading through one of the latest scripts I received just this week, when Emmett joined me in the living room.

"Here I thought you might want to read this," he announced, shoving a newspaper in my hands and heading back into the kitchen.

"Page 10," he said with a smirk.

Intrigued, I skipped the front few pages, eagerly heading towards whatever had Emmett so animated.

My heart stopped dead in my chest, the second my eyes fell upon the main heading.

_The real Edward Cullen, by Isabella Swan._

Stupidly, it never occurred to me to search out Bella's article. Boy was I distracted of late.

I stared at the article for a few seconds in apprehension. Now with it in front of me, I was both curious and slightly concerned about what she may have wrote. The real Edward Cullen – shit! What did she think of me?

There was only one way to find out...

As I began reading, my eyes widened in joy. Her article was well written, funny, sweet, but most of all honest. I must have been reading it the 5th time, when Emmett joined me on the sofa. He flipped the TV on, before arching a knowing eyebrow.

"It seems you made quite the impression yourself," he said, sinking his teeth into the enormous bacon sandwich he had brought in with him.

The shrill ringing of my phone put a stop to any response I may have had. Jumping up, I quickly pulled the phone out of my pocket, and headed for some peace and quiet.

"Hey mom," I said, making my way inside the kitchen. We had a few minutes of small talk about our flight over and general chit chat before she brought up this evenings main event.

"Are you excited about the premier? I've seen all the preparations on the TV," she beamed. Though I could hear the enthusiasm in her voice, it shouldn't have surprised me. She was proud of everything I had ever achieved.

"Yeah it should be a good night," I replied, trying to sound genuinely excited. Obviously I failed.

"Are you okay son? You seem a little distant."

"I'm just tired that's all." It was partially true.

"Edward ..."I could sense the concern in her voice.

"Mom I'm fine," I interrupted. "Honestly, its nothing that a nights good sleep wont cure," I said, hoping to pass it off as nothing more than a bit of delayed jet lag.

"If you say so." She agreed, but I knew she wasn't buying it for one minute. There was not a lot that got past her.

"Oh before I go, I happened to come across something in newspaper today."

"Argh mom what have I told you about that crap!" I rubbed my head in aggravation.

"No, listen here it was nothing scandalous. Just a nice little article I came across."

"Oh really." I played dumb,knowing full well which article she meant.

"Don't play coy with me, son. Is this not the girl that had you all worked up last week?"

"Worked up!" I muttered, shaking my head in disbelief.

"Yes you were. It seems like the feeling was mutual," she cheerful declared.

"She was doing her job that all. She was hardly gonna make me out to be horrible."

"Trust me Edward, words can only go so far, and she was more than complimentary. She sounds smitten."

An awkward silence fell between us. I didn't know what to say. Was she right? Did Bella have any feelings towards me whatsoever?

"Mom please I have to go now," I said as the silence dragged on.

"Okay dear, but you should really thank her for writing such nice things."

It wasn't a bad point. Now why didn't I think of that.

"How?" I shyly asked.

"Girls like a bit of good old fashioned romance. Try sending her some flowers, or a letter,"she offered.

Flowers would be too much. I didn't want to appear like the love sick fool that I was. Instead I would settle for a simple letter.

"Fine, I will speak to you later. Love you."

"Love you too son. Take care."

As soon as I got off the phone I went straight over to my desk, seeking out a piece of paper and an envelope, before I had time to change my mind. Grabbing the nearest pen, I took a moment to compose my words before scribbling down a simple message.

_Bella..._

_It was nice meeting you. I enjoyed our time together._

_Hopefully our paths will cross again soon._

_Thank you for such a complimentary piece!_

_Yours Edward x_

It was nothing earth shattering or monumental, but it was a start. Thankfully I already had Alice's work address, so that would save me from having to go through Leah or Emmett.

I had not long returned to Emmett, when again my phone vibrated. This time it was Alice.

_Thanks again for doing that favour for me. _

_The piece was a hit! You're my hero._

_PS: Do you have anything to tell me yet? Update soon._

_xxxx_

I quickly text a reply back to keep her happy.

**Glad I could be of service.**

**Sadly no news yet :(**

**E xx**

The rest of the day was a bit of a blur, amongst all the preparations and a last minute panic about of all things, what suit I would be wearing. At least it made the day pass quickly and before I knew it we were on our way.

One minute I was in limo, the next I was making my way down the red carpet, through blinding flash lights. I put on my best smile and after signing as many autographs as possible, headed through to the screening. This was always my least favourite part. I always found it so incredibly awkward to watch myself on screen, especially when you know you're being judged for it.

The after party was more of the same over the top extravagance. In truth I hated such fancy gatherings, because they were full of all my fellow celebrities, industry big wigs and pleaser's.

There is so much focus and myth that such events are glamorous and prestigious, but ultimately it is usually just a room full of fake people, all of whom are there for themselves. Needless to say I left before midnight, much to Leah's disgust.

With the premier our of the way, I was back to the job I actually got paid for. Filming started last week and since then it had been relentless and downright exhausting. It would be much of the same story for the next few weeks, as we tried to stick to schedule.

Yet despite the distraction, I felt more and more isolated and unhappy as the days passed. Trying to keep bella to the back of my mind was pretty hard work. Though I had thought I was covering it well, it seems I had been driving Emmett crazy. We had just finishing dinner when he finally snapped.

"That's it, I've had enough of you're moping! We are going out," he announced.

He stood up with hands folded across his chest, in a clear you will do as I say stance. I stared back at him blankly. The last thing I wanted right now was to go out.

It seems Emmett was having none of it. "It will take your mind off whatevers got you in such a mess."

Though I tried to protest, 20 minutes later I somehow found myself ready and waiting for our ride into town.

That didn't mean I was happy about it, but hey it couldn't hurt. For one thing, I could use the distraction.

Needless to say, I was in a fairly bad mood on the ride to the club, and when we got there my fowl mood only increased,even after we skipped the line and headed to the VIP section.

Ah, clubs, there always the same. The atmosphere was sweaty, loud,and lusty, everything you'd expect, even at an exclusive club. It was full of your typical Friday night crowd; few too many drinks, all out for a good time. Shame I had left the party spirit at home.

Emmett handed me a drink just as his phone started ringing. He downed his drink in one, I followed shortly after when he headed outside to take the call.

In his absence I ordered another shot of the strongest thing possible. It went down well, far too well. I was on my second and third in the space on a couple of minutes.

If I thought drinking would help numb the pain it failed. Miserably.

I kept drinking, but if anything, it only made me think more about the person I had desperately been trying to avoid thinking of. To make matters worse, it didn't help that everywhere I looked, there were brown haired disappointments. Truth was, no one lived up to Bella. How could they? She was unique.

I sighed, sinking further into my seat. I had switched back to JD after the last shot burned particularly badly, and once again my thoughts returned straight to Bella.

She had probably not even thought of me once since that day. Even after I sent the damn letter off, I got no response. Swallowing another gulp of Jack, I imagined that right now she was probably out having a good time, laughing, smiling and blushing that adorable way only she could.

And here I was, completely enthralled by her, left alone staring at a half empty glass. Fucking pathetic.

My mood hit an all time low when I noticed a group of girls whispering and staring at me. I knew where this was going. As one member of the group approached, I studied her, but felt nothing whatsoever. Don't get me wrong, she was undeniably pretty, gorgeous even. She was tall, slim, with a great body, and long blonde hair and perfect skin.

She was most guys dream, but not to me. Sadly she was no Bella.

I vaguely registered her talking, but couldn't concentrate enough on what she was even saying. Normally I tried to be polite, but tonight I felt too drained to even be civil.

All I wanted was to sit on my own. Obviously she didn't pick up on that, and she continued to flirt outragously with me. When she reached her hand out to my arm, I pushed her away the second it made contact.

"Look you're just not my type. I prefer brunettes" I said, not even attempting to mask my disinterest.

For a moment, she appeared taken aback, but thankfully she got the message, and sauntered off towards her next target.

Emmett took that moment to return. He eyed me curiously before he spoke. "A bit blunt there weren't you?"

I shrugged and ordered up another drink, knocking it back almost instantly.

"Your on the hard stuff too," he commented, inspecting my glass.

"So," I replied, trying to act indifferent.

"So you gonna tell me what's up? You've been on edge all week."

"Its nothing," I replied, swaying a bit in my seat.

He shot me a warning look. "Edward, I've known you since we were 10 years old. We both know that isn't true."

"I don't wanna talk about it." Besides, I really didn't think he needed to watch me fall apart.

"You're not going anywhere till you get it off your chest. I for one, am sick of your whinny ass hanging around the place like someone killed your cat. Now talk!" He encouraged, completely unaware of the monster he was unleashing.

Emmett looked alarmed when I took another large swig of my drink,so I took another gulp just to spite him.

"Its Bella." I sighed.

"She's the chic from the newspaper?"I could only nod back.

"Might have know it be woman related," he muttered under his breath.

Looking up he appeared sympathetic and for some reason that bugged the hell out of me.

"I get that you like her but get over it already." He made it sound so easy.

I had had far too much to drink by this point. My head was fuzzy, my vision blurry at best. I could even hear myself slurring each and every word. But I didn't care, I was smiling in-spite of my turmoil.

"You don't understand. I cant. Even if I wanted too. She's perfection. No, wait, she's more than perfection. She absolutely amazing, and funny and beautiful and smart. Did I mention she is beautiful and completely perfect. She has the ability to make my heart stop with just one simple look."

Emmett was cringing besides me. "You don't even know her," he interrupted, looking at me like I had quite possibly lost my mind.

"I know enough to know that I want to spend the rest of my life with her."

"Oh please!"

"No I mean it. The first time I saw her it was like there was suddenly this pounding in my chest." I thumped my chest as if to emphasise the point, and only succeeded in knocking over the glasses that were in front of us.

Emmett was quick to clear up the mess, whilst I slumped back in my chair.

"You know what the saddest, worst, most gut wrenching part is?"I asked to no one in particular. By this point Emmett looked even more alarmed than I had ever seen him before.

"She is an angel, and I am someone who doesn't even come close."

"I'm pathetic," I shouted, slamming down my now empty glass.

"No your drunk."

"Truth is, I will never be good enough for her." I carried on regardless of how desperate I sounded.

"Enough!" Emmett pounded his fist on the table, the vibration enough to rattle what glasses were left there.

"I have had it up to here with all this self loathing crap. And I'm sick to fucking death of hearing about how perfect Bella is. Now, you're not allowed to mention her again tonight. We clear?" his voice was firm.

"Whatever." I grumbled. I was about to order another drink, when he swiped my glass right out of my hands.

"Oh no you don't, you've had more than enough already! We are leaving now," he announced, reaching out and taking a firm grip on my arm. I felt myself being lifted out of my seat, but I couldn't protest even if I wanted too. My legs felt like jelly, my head was throbbing, and my eyes were shot to shit.

I tried to reach up to shield my eyes from the blinding light, but my arms failed me. So instead I closed them for a spilt second. I would just close them for a minutes...

The next morning I woke with the hang over of all hangovers. I spent a while in bed nursing my bruised ego and pounding headache. All I wanted to do was bury myself in a hole and never resurface, but eventually I had to face the music.

I sat up quickly, my head spinning from the fast movement. I rubbed my tired eyes as I got up, and managed the short walk into the living room before collapsing on the sofa. At least the room wasn't spinning anymore, as I vaguely recalled it had been when we returned home the previous night.

Moments later Emmett appeared in the kitchen doorway. He offered me a knowing nod, whilst I cringed at the memory of the brief therapy session I inflicted on him.

He came over balancing a couple of mugs, a bowl of cereal and a small pieces of paper. He handed me what I strongly suspected was a receipt of last nights carnage.

Looking down cautiously, I inspected the damage and nearly choked.

So much for last night taking my mind off things. All I got was a rotten hangover and a pretty impressive bar tab.

"Jeez I didn't realise I had that much,"I said in disbelief.

"I told you to slow down. You're lucky you didn't give yourself alcohol poisoning," he scolded.

"Here," he said, handing over a much needed cup of coffee.

Suddenly I felt the need to apologise."Sorry I went all crazy on you last night," I offered.

"Its cool." he shrugged of my apology. "You moving on now?"

I didn't answer straight away. For one thing I knew I couldn't make any promises.

Because, despite last nights drunken ramblings, my feelings towards Bella hadn't changed. All it had showed, was that this creepy obsession was getting me nowhere. There was nothing I could do from half way round world to make her mine. That didn't mean I was giving up- it just meant I would have to wait until I was home, and hopefully get a return on that favour Alice owed me.

"I cant explain it, but I cant let go."

"Thought as much," he replied smiling, before his face suddenly turned serious.

"Just promise to never pull any shit like last night on me ever again. You're lucky there were no paps around. Leah would have strung you up if that little spectacle had made it in the papers!"

"No shit." I could picture the roasting Leah would have given me. I was hardly in her good books as it was.

"You good now?"Emmett asked.

"I'm good," I replied honestly. In spite of the slight queezyness in my stomach, I had reached a milestone. From now on there would be no more moping and pining.

"Well okay then. You better get your shit together, cos we have a busy couple of weeks ahead of us before we get to go home."

It couldn't come fast enough.

**Not too whiny and depressing I hope?**

**Review, if you want me to continue with this story.**

**xxxx**


	5. Chapter 5

**Authors note: Yeah I know its been forever since I last updated this story; 2 years is just disgraceful (hangs head in shame) Anyways, I was thinking of going back to this story and wondered if anyone was still interested in it? This is only a short chapter to start with so I will see what the general feedback is on whether I should continue or move on to something new.  
Disclaimer: You know the deal; I own nothing.**

~Chapter 5~

Unfortunately Emmett wasn't exaggerating when he said we had a busy few weeks ahead of us, and after many long days of shooting and attending a few casting sessions in between I was completely exhausted.  
In addition to that the paparazzi were doing my head. My latest release had been top of the box office for the last two weeks running, which had only fuelled the media interest in me and my personal life.

Everywhere I turned there was an eager journalist or camera capturing my every move. To be honest I thought I was used to it by now, but recently it had gone beyond a joke, and I couldn't even go to the supermarket without getting ambushed!

Thankfully the few remaining re-shoots we had left to complete went off without a hitch and just yesterday we wrapped up filming. That left just a few photo-shoots and a couple of interviews to get through tomorrow and then I would be free to go home for a much needed break.

I couldn't wait to get home and I was even more amazed when Emmett promised me a few extra days off in between the photo-shoots and interviews he had been forced to schedule into our time. A few years ago I learnt that there was no such thing as a vacation, but Emmett had at least promised me it wouldn't be too much of a trial this time round.

Apparently I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up too much because it turned out he was just trying to butter me up for the hectic, downright gruelling schedule he had planned for our return. I was miserable enough already at the thought of several work commitments eating into my time at home, but that resentment quickly turned to anger when I saw my worst nightmare planned out for me the day after we flew in to the London.

"A full day expose. You've gotta be kidding me!" I snapped, fisting the preliminary schedule I had in front of me.  
"Quit moaning, Cullen," Emmett replied. He was unaffected by my annoyance and then the bastard smirked at me!  
"Easy for you to say. You're not the one trapped for the entire day," I scowled.

After a crappy flight I definitely wasn't in the best of moods and I was even less enthusiastic at the prospect of tomorrows torture session. Trust me, I wasn't exaggerating when I said it would be hell. I'd been put through these kind of things many times before and they were all the same nightmare. I mean how are you meant to feel comfortable in front of a complete stranger while they follow you around all day taking notes on your every move. Or worse still, if the interviewer happened to be female and took a liking to me. That was just plain awkward and since the last particularly painful encounter with an over eager female reporter I had refused to do these kind of features altogether. Which was why I was so surprised that Emmett had agreed to this in the first place without at least running it by me first.

When I reiterated my concerns he remained unmoving, and according to him I had no choice but to get on with it.

Still that didn't mean I had to like it and I sent Emmett my best scowl when he came to pick me up the following morning. He offered no response and just smirked back at me, like he was enjoying my misery, which was completely unlike him. Emmett was a joker, true, but he was never unnecessarily cruel.

In fact, he had been acting strangely all morning. For starters he was unusually chirpy which was a first for Emmett because normally he was like a bear with a sore head first thing in the morning. Today was a different story altogether; he was grinning from ear to ear as we made our way into central London. His mood didn't dampen even when we hit rush hour traffic.

Meanwhile I cursed the traffic before settling back in my seat and switching on my ipod. Closing my eyes I tried to contain my apprehensions about today. At some point I must have nodded off, because what felt like only a few minutes later I felt Emmett not so gently poking my arm.  
"Wake up sleeping beauty, we're here," he sounded way too happy. Really what was wrong with him?

Reluctantly, I forced my eyes open and prepared myself for the torture that was to come. Except all my anxieties disappeared the moment that I caught sight of the building that I would know anywhere...  
Bella...  
Her name rung in my ears and I didn't even try to contain the wide grin that spread across my face when we pulled up outside her workplace.

"You can thank me later," Emmett winked as he got out of the car. I was right behind him, like an eager 4 year old about to get ice cream, but I wouldn't care how overexcited I seemed. I practically ran to the reception desk and immediately asked where I could find Bella Swan.

The receptionist looked a little confused by my directness, but she quickly recovered and instructed us to go to the second office on the 3rd floor. Without hesitation I was on the move again and when we reached the lift I impatiently struck the call button but gave up after a few seconds and started climbing the stairs instead. I could hear Emmett's laughter behind me at my eagerness but I couldn't have cared less how ridiculously I was behaving. I wouldn't be happy until I saw her again.

It didn't take us long to reach the 3rd floor and I so anxious to see Bella that I went straight to the her office without pausing. I was in the process of looking around the room when a gentle voice interrupted my search.  
"Can I help you?"

I looked down at the person in front of me and immediately thought of Bella when I noticed the light blush on her cheeks.

"Hello Angela," I said, reading the name badge that was pinned onto her jacket. "I'm looking for Bella Swan," I said smiling wider than was probably natural.

Angela glanced around the room, focused on an empty desk before she replied. "I'm afraid she's not at her desk right now. She's probably in the archive room or maybe the photocopy room. I can go look for her if you would like?"

"No, its fine. I can wait," I put on a smile but inside I was nervous wreck. Suddenly all my confidence had gone and was replaced with concern and uncertainty. What if I had misread things? What if Bella wasn't as excited to see me as I was her.

"If you would like to take a seat in the reception then I can tell her you are waiting when she returns." Angela kindly offered.  
"Would you mind not telling her. Its just that I want to surprise her." I explained.  
"Plus we have a few things to take care of first anyway," Emmett interrupted. "Can you point us in the direction of Kate Beirs office please?" he asked.  
"Sure, its just down the hall on the left." Angela instructed. I smiled back.  
"Thanks for your help."  
"You're welcome Mr Cullen," she replied. So she did recognised me. That explained the slight stammering and blushing.

After Angela pointed us in the right direction we made our way towards the editors office. "Let me do the talking." Emmett ordered me before we entered. I was confused for a second but I understood what he meant when we walked inside the office to find two women anxiously waiting for our arrival. The older looking of the two rose from her seat first.

"Edward, it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Kate, the papers editor. Thank you so much for agreeing to doing the feature," she smiled and offered her hand to me.  
"Its nice to meet you, Kate," I replied shaking her hand, before turning to the blonde woman who was now stood besides us, grinning like a cheshire cat.  
"Hi Edward. I'm sorry that I missed your first visit but I'm sure we can make up for that today," she winked, trying to look alluring I'm sure. It wasn't. There was only one person I was willing to spend the day with and it certainly wasn't the blonde in front of me. I glared across at Emmett to tell him as much and thankfully he intervened. He really was a good negotiator and much more likely to talk them around than I was.

"Actually, about that," he started slowly turning towards Kate. "We thought perhaps it would be easier to stay with the person who conducted the interview last time."

"What?" Lauren shrieked, "but this is my feature."  
"She's right of course," Kate agreed. "This is more her field than anyone else's."  
"I can understand that," Emmett calmly stated, "but I'm sure that my client would be more comfortable with somebody he has already met and spent time with before."

"You can get to know me," Lauren said, reaching out to touch my arm, which I pulled back abruptly.  
"No, I want Bella," I said trying to keep the desperation out of my tone. I turned to Kate pleadingly but from the hard expression on her face I already knew she had made her mind up against me.

"I'm afraid that's just not possible." She said firmly. "She has other deadlines at the moment and I really cant spare her. I'm sorry."  
"I'm sorry about that, Edward," I glared across at Lauren. She didn't look sorry at all. In fact she was looking very pleased with herself. "Looks like its you and me after all," she gleamed.

I rubbed the back of my neck in frustration and a little nervousness about what I was about to resort to. I'd never played the celebrity card before but there was no way in hell I would be spending the day with Lauren instead of Bella.  
"Fine, then the whole thing is off," I declared. I sent Emmett a sly wink as I turned and headed to the door without once looking back. I hadn't even made it to the door before a frantic voice called out.  
"Wait!"

I turned slowly, trying to keep the smirk of my face and giving me away.  
"I'm sure we can come to some sort of agreement," Kate offered.  
"Its Bella or nothing," I said firmly, leaving no room for compromise.  
"Okay, fine. Bella it is." She agreed but I could tell she wasn't happy about it. Lauren didn't look best pleased either. She glared across at her editor like she had betrayed her before storming out of the room all together, cursing under her breathe as she went.

I was in a bit of a daze as Kate went on to explain that she would need a bit of time to delegate Bella's tasks to some of her co workers and then brief her on her new task.

A little while later we left her to it and I went outside only to find Lauren standing a few feet away from the door. I could tell she was still disappointed but any sympathy I may have felt for her immediately went when I heard her bad mouthing Bella to one of her co workers.  
"I mean whats so special about Bella anyway? She isn't even that pretty." She snipped.

On our way past I sent her stern look which soon shut her up. Her friend at least had the decency to look embarrassed, while Lauren just shrugged.

"I'm going to find Bella." I told Emmett as I made my way back to the reception area. "Do you want me to introduce you?" I offered.  
"Na, you can introduce me later. I'll go and try clear up some of the mess your little tantrum in there caused," he said though I could tell me was only teasing.

"Thanks Emm," I replied smiling as I made my way back to find Bella. My smile soon vanished when I looked across the room and there was still no sigh of her. I was stood frowning when Angela approached me with a shy smile.  
"She's back," she told me. I shot a quick glance at Bella's empty desk, but once again saw nothing. No doubt picking up on my confusion she added, "She is there, she's just hiding."

My curiosity got the better of me and I approached her desk quickly. And sure enough, there she was, with her head collapsed against her desk. At first I thought she was hurt but then I remembered what Angela had said about her hiding. I relaxed for a moment, but then tensed again when a sudden thought hit me; Had she spotted me when I came in? Was that the reason she was hiding? I hoped not, but there was only one way to find out for sure.

I moved in closer till I was stood directly besides her. I wanted to sweep the hair off her face but instead I settled for a gentle tap on her shoulder. There was no response at first so I tried again. Still she didn't respond, except for a low cursing that I strained to hear. I tried one last time and was just about to speak when she snapped.  
"For God's sake, Mike! I swear to god if you ask me one more time, then I will seriously lose my temper." She ranted.  
She had quite a temper on her which I found rather amusing. I couldn't hold in my laughter as she kept her head buried in her hands. "What happened to the shy, blushing girl that I met just last month?" I playfully joked.

When Bella finally lifted her head to look at me I was a little breathless. My memories really didn't do her justice and she was even more beautiful than I remembered.  
"Edward?"  
The bewildered look on her face was priceless and I couldn't help teasing her. "You look surprised to see me," I said smiling.  
She still looked shell shocked and after a slight pause she finally spoke. "What are you doing here?"  
"Silly Bella," I smiled at the adorably confused expression on her face. "I'm here for a feature, but while I'm here, you don't honestly think I would pass up on the chance to spend some more time with the shy and reserved girl who portrayed me in such a positive light in her interview." I told her honestly.

Thinking of her earlier outburst made my smile widen and I couldn't resist teasing her some more. "Though, I'm not so sure that I am the only actor around here. That was quite the transformation back there. I actually feel rather scared for this Mike character."

"Arghhh you're impossible!" she groaned but I could tell she wasn't offended.  
"Impossibly beautiful, according to you." I smirked, the words from her article slipped out before I could help it. I didn't regret my teasing one bit when the beautiful blush I had been dreaming about made its first appearance of the day.  
"There we go. That's more like the girl I remember. I have missed those rosy cheeks," I joked causing her to blush even deeper.

"So what's the deal with this Mike guy that has you so wound up?" I tried to keep my tone teasing, hoping she wouldn't pick up on my jealousy.  
"I am NOT wound up!" she stubbornly replied, while I fought to hide my amusement. She was just so damn adorable when she was flustered.  
"Okay, so maybe I am a little bit cranky today." She reluctantly admitted.  
"A bit?" I laughed at her stubbornness but quickly shut up when she continued.  
"He is doing my head in!"  
"Mike?" I suspected, already hating this guy who I'd only got a glimpse of weeks ago.  
"Who else?" she groaned, looking even more frustrated. "He just wont take no for an answer. I have told him repeatedly and in no uncertain terms that I will never go to the benefit with him, but he just doesn't get the message. I've tried being nice about it, but that doesn't work either. Even when I'm downright rude to him, it only seems to encourage him all the more. I really don't think I can take any more!"

Any jealousy I may have felt about this guy pursuing Bella evaporated when I watched her close her eyes and her head hung in defeat. She looked so frustrated that I wanted to reach out and comfort her. The best I could do was suggest a way to get rid of him. "Why don't you tell him you've met somebody?"

"Already tried that one, but he just insists on meeting the guy." Bella sounded even more fed up than before and she then started rambling again. "Aghhhh, it's so infuriating. I know I should be grateful and flattered that he feels that way. Maybe Jessica is right. I should just accept it and give it a shot. Then I can be horrible to him and drive him away. Or maybe the problem lies within me. Perhaps I'm just being picky and should be less demanding. Mike's not complicated; maybe I should settle for that."

When she came to the end of her rambling I struggled to keep a hold of my temper. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "You shouldn't have to settle for anything, Bella," I told her fiercely, looking deeply into her eyes to reiterate my point.

When Bella eventually broke eye contact and glanced around the room, her face fell and she groaned. My gaze followed hers and I saw the guy from the cafeteria all those weeks ago walking through the room looking towards the two of us.

"Is that him?" I asked already knowing the answer.

"The one and only," she answered before turning to me urgently. "Don't leave me. Please? He wont come near me if he sees you're next to me."

As she begged me to stay a plan came into my mind about how she could get rid of that idiot once and for all. "I have an idea of a way that Mike will finally get the message," I said hesitantly.  
"I'm all ears." Bella agreed easily but I wanted to make sure that she okay with what I was about to suggest.  
"You trust me?" I whispered as I crouched down in front of her. Bella didn't speak but she nodded back so I continued. "Just go along with me, okay?" I whispered.

"Okay," Bella agreed. I reached out gently cupping her face in my hands. I felt a shiver run through her as I leaned in closer so my face was just inches from hers. I couldn't help myself and my gaze drifted to her lips. I was pushing things, but I couldn't control myself as I gently tilted my face up, closing the distance between the two of us even more. I was so desperate to kiss her that I was struggling to control myself. Lifting her chin with my thumb and forefinger I could see that she was nervous so I was quick to reassure her.  
"Relax" I soothed.

I was aware that what I was about to do was a bad call, but regardless of the rights and wrongs I couldn't stop myself. Before I could talk myself out of it, I leaned in closer and lightly brushed Bella's lips with my own. She didn't responded immediately and I panicked that I had overstepped the mark, but thankfully she started to respond a few seconds later.

When she drew me closer I took control of the kiss. I didn't want to come across too strong and scare her away so I kept the kiss gentle and unhurried and it was still incredible. I had never had a kiss quite like it before. I couldn't contain my enthusiasm when Bella joined in more, encouraging me to make the kiss stronger. I realised that I was in anger of getting carried away and I reluctantly broke the kiss. Even then I didn't move to far away from her, at least not immediately.

Still, it was torture and I was tempted to kiss her again, but I didn't. I didn't want to push her too far too soon. Instead we simply sat there holding each others gazes. It could have been seconds or minutes before Bella's face dropped and she looked nervously around the room. My gaze followed hers and it was only then that I realised what I had done had caused a scene. Many people were blatantly looking our way, among them was this Mike character who was still focused on Bella, who was now blushing and staring at the ground.

I studied her and once again she seemed sad. I didn't know what was going on in her head but I hoped she wasn't upset with me. "I think he got the message." I told her.  
"Thanks," she replied shyly, finally lifting her gaze up to meet mine. She still looked a little sad but I could tell she was trying to hide it.  
"Any time, Bella," I responded quietly. She was too close, and I was having too many problems with my self control so I forced myself away from her and I left before I lost control completely.

"I have to go do some shots for the piece, but I will see you later." I offered her a half smile before moving away and walking off in search of Emmett, hoping I hadn't blown my chances.

**A/N: Hopefully the chapter was worth the wait! Thanks for ****sticking with this story and please review:)**


	6. Chapter 6

My Only Thought

~Chapter 6~

**AN: No your eyes really aren't decieving you. I am finally getting round to updating this fic! It has been way too long, and I'm sure many of you (myself included) thought that the next chapter was never coming. But what can I say? I couldn't leave this story where it was and seems as it's Christmas I decided to try and give the next chapter a go. **

**I have received so many lovely reviews throughout this story so I really hope you like it:) You may need to go back a few chapters to see where the story left off. I know I had to.**

**}*{**

"Why are you smiling like that?" Emmett asked when I went back to meet him in the office.

"No reason." I was bluffing and Emmett was quick to call me up on it.

"I take it you saw your girl?" He teased.

"She's not my girl." At least not yet, I silently added.

"Whatever," he shrugged, "I can't wait to meet the girl who's finally caught your eye!" he declared with a wicked grin.

"Just go easy on her, Emm." I cautioned. "She's important to me, okay?"

"Of course Bro. Looks like she's here," he said, pointing towards the doorway.

I resolved to stay calm and collected but the second Bella came into the room my resolve flew right out of the window. I couldn't help it, and straight away my eyes drifted to her lips.

I could see that she was nervous but I was determined to put her at ease. I sent her a smile which she returned before her gaze drifted over to Emmett.

She looked shocked, maybe even a little bit intimidated but that was nothing unusual. Emmett was a big guy; he had that effect on everyone. But I had no doubt that once Bella got to know him properly she would get passed his scary exterior.

"Bella, allow me to introduce you to my manager and good friend, Emmett. Emmett, this is Bella." I introduced them.

While Bella smiled shyly, Emmett's grin was unmistakably devious. He looked way too happy and I could tell he was going to enjoy ribbing me. My suspicions were confirmed a moment later when he spoke.

"So, this is the famous Bella. I feel like I know you already, after the amount of times that Edward's mentioned you," he said causing Bella's cheeks to flame scarlet. It was something that I would never tire of seeing. And if I wasn't mistaken, she seemed pleased to hear that I'd obviously spoken about her to my best friend.

"Edward was right about you. You're very pretty and I get to see the famous blush too." He continued. If possible her blush deepened and sensing that Bella was a little uncomfortable by the attention I told him to back off.

"Emmett, shut it. You're embarrassing her," I warned.

"She knows I'm only messing. Isn't that right, Bells?" he replied undeterred and I watched on as he literally lifted her off her feet into his arms.

While Bella looked temporarily bewildered I sent Emmett a harsh look. I knew I was being ridiculous but I couldn't help it. Emmett was my best friend and I knew that he wouldn't step on my toes, but I couldn't control the jealousy that ran though me as I watched the two of them together.

"Emmett, put her down, you're crushing her," I ordered, struggling to keep my temper in check.

"Yes Master," Emmett replied with a laugh, no doubt amused by my possessive behaviour.

Relieved when he placed her back on the ground, I went straight over to Bella, much to Emmett's amusement.

"I believe I am spending the day with you." She said when she had finished righting her crumpled clothing.

I was about to respond, when Emmett once again beat me to it.

"Of course you are. He," he said looking pointedly at me with a huge grin, "was the one who insisted you do the feature. We have spent half the morning negotiating it with your boss. I swear if he hadn't threatened to pull the plug on the whole thing, then I'm sure they would still be having the debate as we speak."

"Is this true?" Bella asked, her surprise obvious.

I nodded shyly, slightly uncomfortable and uneasy about what I was about to admit to.

"I kind of told them I would only do it if you were the one I was spending the day with." When I said it like that, I did sound kind of demanding.

"Really?" Bella seemed genuinely surprised which I will admit hurt a little. Wasn't it obvious how much I enjoyed spending time with her? Didn't she feel the connection I felt there was between the two of us?

"Are you hungry?" I asked, quickly changing the subject. Luckily Bella agreed without questioning my sudden change of conversation.

"Do you fancy grabbing something to eat and drink first?" I offered.  
"We could go to a café, perhaps?" Bella suggested.

"I was thinking somewhere a little different," I told her.

"So no greasy spoon today?" she teased.

"Not today," I replied smiling.

"Our café not good enough for you now?" Bella accused, then blushed when she realised what she'd said. If I was smiling before, then I was all out grinning when she referred to the café as ours. But as much as I enjoyed our time in one of my favourite place, I had other plans for today. I wanted to treat her to something a little more extravagant. My mission today was to spoil her.

"I was thinking somewhere a little different. Today, I am taking you to lunch."

The look on Bella's face was priceless and I couldn't help but chuckle at her slightly dazed expression.

"Nice to finally meet you, Bella." Emmett called out as I took Bella's hand in mine and started leading her towards the door.

"What are you smiling at?" I asked curiously when I noticed a slight smile playing on Bella's lips.

"Nothing," she replied quickly. Her blush intrigued me but I let it go and led her outside.

As we walked though the office hand in hand, I couldn't help but be away of the attention our arrival was gathering and I looked down to Bella to see how she was coping. It was probably a little overwhelming for her, but she seemed to be handling it well.

Or at least she was until the moment we stepped outside. Almost immediately I noticed a change in her body language and I could tell that her concerns had kicked in. She seemed nervous, but I was determined to put her at ease, so I kept a closer hold on her as we walked towards the station.

When we reached the entrance of the station though, she stalled and I turned around to see her concerned expression.

"Edward you cant be serious. People will recognize you," she warned.

"Trust me, Bella," I responded. She looked so beautiful when she was concerned that I couldn't stop myself from reaching out and resting my hands on the top of her shoulders.

"It will be fine. Most people don't approach me, and if they do, I give them a quick autograph or photo and they are satisfied," I explained, hoping to ease her concern.

"Fine." Bella agreed, but she still looked sceptical as I took her hand in mine once more and led her inside the station.

I wasn't lying when I told Bella people usually kept their distance, but still I wasn't willing to let go of her as we made our way through the ticket barrier and down to the platform.

To Bella's obvious surprise we walked through relatively unscathed. Sure there were a few people blatantly staring in our direction but thankfully they left us to it as I'd predicted. Bella looked adorable when she was confused and I couldn't help but gloat as I leaned down to whisper in her ear.

"I told you it would be fine. Most fans are too embarrassed to approach me. Either that, or they think I am too scary and intimidating." I smiled smugly.

"You, intimidating? Hardly!" She sniggered and I decided to have a little fun with her.

I turned bringing my full height over her, trying to look as intimidating as I could without really scaring her. My plan seemed to be working, when I felt a shiver run through her. I leaned in closer so my face was inches from hers, intent on making more of my act, except my teasing came back to bite me in the ass when I realised how close we were.

Uncontrollably, my gaze drifted to her lips. I wanted to kiss her so much but I forced myself to step back and keep a respectable distance between the two of us.

"I'll have you know that I can be very intimidating if I want to be," I declared, trying to remain on track. I couldn't hold it in any longer and I smirked at Bella's bewildered expression.

"I wish you could have seen your face; it was a picture," I said grinning from ear to ear.

"Shut it Cullen," she sulked.

She looked so adorable I couldn't keep my hands to myself. I draped my arm around her shoulders, pulling her tightly against me. "You're adorable when you're mad," I said, rubbing her shoulder affectionately.

A few minutes passed before the tube arrived and we found two seats next to each another.

"Where are we going?" Bella asked suddenly.

"I told you, I am taking you to dinner. I need some food before the real work begins," I replied. When she smiled I reached out and took her hand in mine.

"What is the plan for the rest of the day?"

"Impatient, aren't we?" I smirked at her inquisitive nature.

"I like to know what I am letting myself in for," she justified.

"Well you will have to wait and see!" I replied, refusing to give anything away.

I was expecting Bella to question me some more but when a movement at the corner of my eye caught my attention, I turned to see an elderly lady had got on at the current stop. I stood automatically and offered her my seat without a second thought, brushing aside her thanks.

As the tube started picking up speed I was trying my best to avoid hitting my head on the roof when I felt Bella reach for my hand as she tugged me down to look at her.

"Have my seat; you are practically touching the roof," she offered.

"Absolutely not. That is out of the question." I was horrified by the suggestion.

I heard a light chuckling beside me and turned to see the old lady smiling at us.

"Let the young man take care of you, dear. There are far too few considerate men around nowadays." She smiled, which had both Bella and I blushing like teenagers.

Several minutes later, I was beginning to curse being so tall when my head once again hit the roof, but it was worth it to see the smile on Bella's face.

When we reached our stop I reached across, lightly tapping her knee to get her attention.

"This is us," I said and offered her my hand when the tube came to an abrupt halt.

We left the station and headed towards the restaurant I had in mind.

"Good afternoon, sir, madam," the waiter spoke, looking first at me before quickly turning his interest towards Bella. His smile was wide bordering on sleazy and I clenched my fist at the leery look he was sending her way.

"Table for two, please," I said sternly to gain his attention.

"Certainly sir," the waiter replied, though he still couldn't draw his eyes away from Bella. I struggled to keep my temper in check but when we reached our table in the far corner and he was about to pull my chair out for Bella, I'd had enough.

"I will take it from here," I said, sending him an icy glare before he finally took the hint and left.

When we were settled in our seats I noticed Bella looking around the room curiously before narrowing her eyes at me accusingly.

"You could have at least given me some warning," She accused.

"Warning about what?" I asked, amused.

"That you were going to bring me to a fancy restaurant!" She exclaimed.

"I was hardly going to take you to McDonald's now, was I?" I teased.

"I know, but a heads up would have been nice. I look like a scruff!" She worried unnecessarily.

"You look perfect," I told her honestly.

"Phfft," she muttered disbelieving.

My girl couldn't take a compliment, but if I had anything to do with it she was going to have to get used to it.

"I saw the way that waiter looked at me. I stand out in my jeans and T-shirt!" Bella grumbled.

"Trust me, it wasn't your choice of clothing that he was inspecting,"I replied, feeling my anger creping back.

"What is that supposed to mean?" She asked disbelievingly.

"He was checking out a lot more than your clothing!" I exclaimed.

"You are quite wrong." Bella stubbornly replied.

"You might be oblivious to it, but I most definitely am not. I'm a guy, I saw the way he looked at you, Bella, the way he is still looking at you," I was ready to explode when I looked across the room and saw he was still staring at our table.

I glared at him warningly but he only had eyes for the girl sat opposite me. I was even more furious when his smile turned to a smirk when Bella turned around to see who I was glaring at.

She blushed furiously before quickly turning back round.

"I told you so," I said, taking no joy in being right. Eager for a distraction away from the slight tension in the atmosphere, I summoned a different waiter across to take our drinks had just finished placing our order when the douche from earlier returned.

"Would the lady like something to drink?" he said, leering over Bella. I'd had enough and snapped.

"_We're _fine," I said firmly, emphasizing the 'we' part, as I glared at the waiter clearly telling him to back off. He got the message onceand for all.

"Was that really necessary?" Bella scolded me when he'd left us alone.

"Yes, I don't like the way he looks at you." I grumbled before turning my attention to menu. Once I had decided what I was having I glanced up at Bella's bewildered expression. "Ignore the prices," I said knowing she would likely order the cheapest option going.

"Have what you want, not what is the cheapest. Don't think I don't know you intended on choosing the cheapest thing on the menu."

Bella's blush confirmed my suspicions

After a different waiter had taken our order, we fell silent as we waited for our food to arrive. For some reason the atmosphere between us suddenly felt strangely charged. It was almost like we were on a date as we made polite conversation and chit chat. We were both trying too hard and I could tell thatBella had something on her mind, but I wasn't going to push her until she was ready to tell me whatever it was that was bothering her.

"What are we doing?" she asked finally breaking the silence.

"We are having dinner, or is that a trick question?" I countered.

"No, I mean what am I doing here with you? Surely you remember that celebrity features aren't my speciality." Bella reminded me.

"I asked for you to do it," I replied, unsure where she was going with this.

"That's what I don't understand," she responded, obviously not satisfied with my response.

"What's not to understand?" I asked, genuinely confused.

"Why would you ask for me specifically?" Bella asked shyly.

"Is it so unthinkable for me to like spending time with you, Bella? Besides, I find you rather entertaining," I told her honestly.

"I'm glad I amuse you," Bella replied sarcastically.

All joking aside I wanted to convey how much I enjoyed spending time with her, and I reaching for her hands across table, intertwining her fingers with mine.

"I don't usually like reporters, but you're different. I find myself fascinated by you. You're the most intriguing woman I have ever met. I'm drawn to you, Bella," I admitted.

Bella smiled at my admission before looking around the room with a slight frown.

"Is it like this everywhere you go?" she questioned.

"Pretty much," I replied, my gaze followed hers and I became aware of the people watching us intently. I didn't focus on them. If I'm honest, it was a lot easier to forget all about them when Bella was sat opposite me.

"How do you deal with it?" she asked, sounding genuinely intrigued.

"It's difficult, but it goes with the territory. I'm not going to lie and say I like it, but I knew what I was getting myself into when I became an actor. I accept that it is a part of the job." I explained.

"You're probably used to it." She spoke so quietly that I was unsure if she meant for me to hear her.

"What do you mean?" I challenged.

"Nothing," she said shyly which made me all the more curious.

Sensing that I wasn't about to give up, she eventually gave in. "I bet all the girls were chasing after you in high school," she speculated.

She couldn't have been any further from the truth and I told her as much.

"Hardly I was a geek," I said, struggling to contain my laughter.

"Oh, please! Look at you, I bet all the girls were fighting over you," Bella accused.

"Things were pretty different back then. I was awkward and painfully shy. I couldn't even talk to girls, let alone ask one out," I admitted.

"I find that hard to believe." Bella still didn't look convinced.

"Trust me, its true." I said, feeling my own blush appearing.

"Please, you're Edward Cullen, you could get any girl you want!"

"Not back then. Not a lot of girls will look twice at you when you have braces and terrible skin. So, what about you?" I deflected to her.

"I don't want to discuss that, it's embarrassing." Bella said dismissively, stubbornly. It was adorable.

"I bet you were one of the popular girls who had all the boys running around after you?" It was my turn to accuse her.

"Why is it that you always seem to turn the questions around on me. Maybe you should consider a career in journalism." She tried to divert the attention away from herself but I was on to her.

"As interesting as your observation may be, you're avoiding the question. I'm on to you," I smirked while Bella stayed stubbornly silent.

"You were, weren't you? You were in with the cool kids," I mocked.

"Not likely, the cool kids didn't even know I was alive." she replied, sadness creeping into her tone.

"I find that hard to believe," I said gently, and was rewarded with my favourite blush.

After the teasing, we both seemed to loosen up and we were once again comfortable with one another. Being around Bella was torture but the most enjoyable form of torture possible. Controlling myself required a enormous amount of self control that I had never foreseen, and every blush, every laugh made me want to kiss her.

I could have stayed in the restaurant forever but when the time came for us to move on to our next port-of-call I looked across to tell Bella that we were leaving, only to find her deep in thought.

"What's wrong?" I asked gently, nudging her lightly.

"Nothing," she shrugged, trying to act indifferent, but I could sense that something was bothering her.

"I think your girlfriends are getting jealous," she finally admitted when she realised we were going no where until she told me what was wrong.

I took her hand in mine and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Lets give them something to really be jealous of," I announced before lifting her hand and placing a delicate kiss on top.

I led Bella out of the restaurant, much to the annoyance of some of our fellow dinners.

"Yeah thanks for that, now I'm marked for execution," Bella joked.

"Don't worry, I will look out for you," I said reassuringly, holding on to her a little tighter.

When I looked to Bella she was once again deep in thought, frowning slightly and I couldn't understand why.

"Why do you do that?" I asked. "You look so deep in thought. I wish I knew what was going on in your head. Sometimes you look so sad."

"Do I?" She played dumb.

"You're doing it again," I arched a knowing eyebrow to her. "You're trying to avoid my question by asking another question."

"You do that a lot, by the way," I added, when I senses she wasn't ready to tell me what was bothering her.

Next up was the photo-shoot, which was one of my least favourite aspects of my job. Luckily we were working with an experienced team, one whom I had worked with before so it helped ease some of my nerves. It also helped that the photographer Tyler was a true professional and someone I enjoyed working with.

His assistant James, was another story all together. By all accounts he had a bit of a reputation and I was sure to keep my eye on him throughout the shoot. Perhaps I was a little on edge after the incident at the restaurant but I couldn't help be a little protective over Bella.

Sadly, my fears were confirmed when I came back from a final wardrobe change to find James lingering over Bella. I couldn't hear what he was saying to her, but whatever it was he was clearly making Bella feel uncomfortable. She was shifting nervously in her seat and looking every where other than at him.

A moment later I was on my way towards them, and when Bella spotted me the relief on her face was obvious.

"Everything okay, here?" I asked once I was besides her. My gaze focussed on James telling him without words to back the fuck off.

In a flash, his heated expression shot to me before returning to Bella.

"I was just teasing, don't be so sensitive," he said, raising his arm to place his hand on her cheek.

"Bella is with me, so I suggest you back off," I warned, catching his arm mid air.

James, looked furious for a moment, before he admitted defeat, muttering under his breath as he stalked off in the opposite direction, slamming the door as he went.

"You just cant stay out of trouble, can you?" I teased when I had calmed down a little.

There were only a few final shoots left to take before we moved on to our next appointment; a round of interviews to finish off the day. Thankfully, the interviews were fairly informal and brief. All in all they went pretty well, excluding one female reporter who was more interested in flirting with me than discussing any of my movies. Thankfully, we had a tight schedule to stick to, so we had to move on to the next one before it got out of hand.

"How do you cope with the same old tedious questions?" Bella asked when we were on a break between interviews.

"It's just a part of the job. The fun part is trying to make each one different," I explained.

"I'm sorry, I must have really bored the shit out of you," she apologised.

"You were far from boring. I told you I enjoyed our time together and I meant it," I told her honesty.

All day I had been thinking of way to bring up the kiss but now was the time. I just didn't know how to start.

"Bella, I've been trying to find a way of bringing this up all day. Earlier ...the kiss," I began sensitively, knowing Bella was going to be embarrassed no matter how I brought it up.

"No, Edward, it's fine," she started, but I was determined to speak my mind.

"Bella, please, we need to discuss this," I pleaded.

"Edward, it's fine. Honestly, I appreciate what you did, but lets just leave it at that. You did me a favour, nothing more, nothing less. We don't need to go over this Edward. It's not necessary. Lets just drop it and pretend like it never happened," she said obviously flustered.

"If you're sure," I replied deflated but I refused to force her. I wasn't going to push her into anything when she wasn't ready.

"I am," she said, though she sounded a little uncertain.

"Okay, Bella, but at least allow me to say one thing." I said, determined to have at least one thing known before she closed the subject completely.

"For me, it " perfect... I was about to say when Emmett voice broke the moment.

"EDWARD, WE NEED YOU NOW!" he yelled from the other side of the room.

I shook my head and swore under my breathe at Emmett untimely interruption.

"Subject officially dropped," I said, before scurrying towards Emmett to see what the problem was.

"Hey, Bells, how's it going?" Emmett asked when we joined her a short while later.

"I'm good, thanks, Emmett. This all takes some adjusting though. Who knew the world of a superstar was so hard?" Bella grinned.

"Well, you'd better get used to it," Emmett muttered back.

"Is it more of the same tomorrow?" Bella asked when my final interview was over.

"I have a few loose ends to tie up, but hopefully I will have the rest of the day to spend with my family," I replied trying and failing to sound casual. There was something about Bella that meant I wasn't able to lie to her so I tried to avoid her knowing stare.

"You're hiding something," she announced.

"No I am not. There's nothing," I replied finally making eye contact.

"Yes there is. I can see it in your eyes. You had that same look when the last guy asked if you had any new projects in the pipeline," she was like a dog with a bone but I found her determination endearing.

"Damn it Bella, I can't hide anything from you, can I?" I admitted,

"Its a talent of mine, I'm on to you, Cullen. I know you're stalling." she exclaimed, grinning with delight.

"Okay, so there is something," I surrendered to her winning smile.

"I knew it!" she announced triumphantly.

"You do realize that you look like a kid in a sweet shop," I laughed at her excitement.

"I don't care! Tell me the big secret," she demanded, attempting to sound stern.

For a split second, I was half-tempted to break my silence but I couldn't risk divulging the details of my future projects until it was all confirmed. Bella frowned, sensing that I wasn't about to give it up.

"Don't look at me like that, Bella," I begged. I hated seeing her so disappointed.

"Like what?" she feigned innocence.

"You look utterly dejected and as much as I would like to tell you, I cant! I'm sworn to secrecy. I cant break that, not even you for you. Besides its early days anyway."

She offered me a small smile in return as my hands found hers, intertwining our fingers.

"Rest assured that when it is all official, you will be the first one to know," I promised.

"I'll hold you to that," she responded.

When the day drew to a close I offered to ring a taxi for Bella but she refused my offer, insisting that the tube was much quicker anyway. Reluctantly, I agreed but not without insisting that I walked with her to the station.

We walked in silence to our destination, both lost in our thoughts. I didn't know how I was going to say goodbye to her all over again.

"Cold?" I asked when I felt a shiver run through her.

"Just a little." It came out a little muffled from her chin being buried so deeply in her coat. She sent me a quizzical look when I removed my hand from hers and started pulling my own scarf off and wrapped it around her.

"You're freezing; you need to be better wrapped up. I cant have you catching a cold," I said matter-of-factly.

"Thanks," she said gratefully.

"I have to keep you warm," I offered.

Much sooner than I would have liked we reached the station and I prepared to say goodbye to Bella.

She was in the process scarf off when I halted her movement. "You keep it. No buts you're keeping it," I said, sensing that she was about to protest.

"You cant be serious!" she said disbelieving.

"I most certainly am. It's only a cheap thing anyway. Think of it as something to remember me by," I didn't like the sound of the finality of my statement.

An awkward silence seemed to fall upon us as we prepared to say our goodbyes. I wanted to do so much more but when I finally worked up the courage to give Bella a kiss on the cheek, she moved her head up a fraction too high, which resulted in me kissing her nose instead.

"That was different," I joked, while I gazed into her eyes, trying to make the most of every last second with her.

"I'll be seeing you, Bella," I said, pulling her to me one final time. I didn't want to let her go but I forced myself to when I realised I had been holding onto her for longer than was appropriate.

"Bye, Edward, and thanks for today," Bella said, before turning and walking away from me. Half way down the steps she looked back at me, with a sad expression that I had no doubt matched my own.

After she had gone, I stood staring down the steps Bella had disappear down for a good five minutes before I finally forced myself to move on, hoping that our goodbye wasn't as final as it felt.

**AN: It's been so long since I wrote Edwards pov, I was so nervous posting this chapter.**

**There will be no more updates until after Christmas. I'm a Christmas eve baby so extra celebrating to be had by me:). Wishing you all a merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year.**


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